The Atwood Sister: Part 2
by juniormands
Summary: Sequal to 'The Atwood Sister'. Rachel begins school at Harbor but tention soon arises between her and Seth as others move to break them up. Caleb and Julie begin to cause the Cohen's trouble as they stop at nothing to make sure Rachel leaves Newport
1. The First Day

_**THE FIRST DAY**_

_They said it was a time to start over,_

_A time to start fresh._

_So why do I feel _

_As though nothings changed at all?_

_-Eternal Beginning_

_-Age _

People swarmed all around, shadows and blurs as they moved swiftly. Ghost like were their faces, stoned cold and empty of emotion. Distant to the objects amongst them, they seemed to float rather than walk, move without intending to.

Rachel stared at them as they passed her; drawn in by their expressions as she felt a fear wash over her. She jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

Whirling around she came face to face with Seth who wore a strange attempt at a lopsided grin.

"How's my baby girl doing? Any first day jitters?" He asked playfully tickling her.

"It's not my first day of _school_, it's just my first day at _Harbor_, and...yeah," she replied shrugging slightly.

Seth rapped his arm around her. "Oh, someone has butterflies in their stomach," he teased in a baby voice.

"More like bats," Rachel replied leaning into him.

She had always liked the feel of him when they were together, the way she seemed to fit perfectly into his arms, they way he always kept certain things just for her.

It had been over six months now since they had first met and thinking back on the past times, Rachel couldn't think of a single moment where he hadn't supported her. Even in the darkest times.

"Hey, Rachel, first day at Harbor, how does it feel?" Marissa asked as she and Ryan walked up to them.

Ryan gave his sister a small nod and she grinned at him.

"We just went over all this...but oh wait, you were late and therefore did not hear it," Seth stated.

Ryan let on an apologetic face. "Yeah, sorry about that, got caught talking to Luke who now seems to have a fascination with tartan sweaters."

"Luke in tartan? That's an image I really didn't need."

Seth only nodded his head when non other than Luke walked up to the group wearing – as Ryan had said – a blue tartan sweater and off white pants.

"And yet suddenly I am seeing it."

"Hey everyone," Luke greeted. "Rachel, first day, gotta be a tough one."

"There are bats," Rachel replied causing everyone to look at her strangely. "Don't worry."

"Well there is nothing to worry about, we'll take care of you," Marissa promised. "Plus, Summer and Anna should be floating around somewhere in case you need something."

"That's something I _really_ needed to hear," Rachel replied sarcastically.

No two other people were more bent on destroying the relationship between her and Seth than Summer and Anna. Rachel, though she knew Seth loved her deeply, couldn't help but feel awkward around the pair. They made her feel un-important and small, something that never went down well with her.

"So you have everything you need Rach?" Ryan asked.

"Ry', for the last time will you stop asking me that?" His sister replied.

"Just checking."

"You're starting to sound like Sandy."

Marissa smiled at that knowing that the Cohen's had taken Rachel under their wing as another equal member of the family.

"Sandy and Kirsten nervous too?" She asked.

"They nearly didn't let me out of the house this morning."

"And then," Seth went on. "Dad insisted on dropping us off right in front of the doors so that Rachel didn't feel lost or anxious."

"Hey, you're the one who agreed it was a good idea," Rachel retorted.

"I did not."

"Then what was with the whole 'yeah, just so she doesn't have to walk so far' thing?"

Seth went silent, his girlfriend beating him with his own words. Rachel noticed his sudden lack of words and moved in closer, resting her head on his chest.

"Not that I'm complaining that I have three guys making a fuss over me."

Summer watched the group from afar noticing how Seth and Rachel couldn't keep their hands off each other. It disgusted her. She didn't want to watch it any longer.

"There's no place like home. There's no place like home. There's no place like home," she whispered tapping her heels together three times.

When nothing happened Summer looked down at her pumps and cursed.

"Damn, that's false advertising!"

She decided that if she couldn't whisk herself out of eyesight she would have to stop them from doing the things that were making her mad.

She walked up and suddenly appeared before the group and Seth instantly felt Rachel move closer as if to show that this was her turf and the new arrival could not have any of it.

"Hi all!" She said a little too friendly like. "Everyone looking forward to starting school again?"

Her voice was filled with a fake kindness that didn't suit her personality well. The reaction she received was one of raised eyebrows and rolled eyes.

"What, can't I be totally happy to be back at school with my friends?"

"It's great that you're happy Summer, but don't you think that it's a little too much?" Marissa asked.

"No," Summer insisted. "What don't I have to be happy about?" She sent a sly look Rachel's way. "Rachel, I see you are like, going to Harbor now. Wow you Chino people just keep piling in don't you?"

Rachel glared back at her, the two sharing a silent moment of sizing each other up. When Ryan realised what they were doing he began to talk.

"So what do you guys have first?" He asked stupidly.

"Math," Rachel replied with a coldness in her voice.

Seth hugged her tightly letting out a gasp. "The subject that leads to a whole lot of naughtiness. But for us, that's just all in a days work."

Rachel smiled and let out a small laugh remembering that she had walked in on Seth studying Math mere hours before they had acknowledged their feelings toward each other. Summer immediately saw the sudden playfulness between the two and tore them apart.

"Cohen can I talk to you about...English?" She asked taking his hand and ripping him away from Rachel and the group.

"But we aren't in the same English class," Seth insisted.

"I know."

Rachel frowned at Summer's attempt to put a stop to their romantic connections and folded her arms annoyed.

"And the nightmare begins," she mumbled causing Luke to look her way.

"Don't worry about Summer, she just can't handle rejection, especially to new people in town," he assured.

* * *

At lunch time Rachel walked out of her classroom only to find that Ryan was there waiting for her.

"Hey, how was class?" He asked.

"Now I remember why I hated school," Rachel replied only causing her brother to frown. "No...I didn't mean anything went wrong, it was just the whole fact that I was sitting in _class_ that I hated."

Ryan laughed. "Yeah I know what you mean."

A group of students passed them as they walked through the door on the way to their lockers.

"You wanna come to lunch with us Chino?" One of the males asked.

Rachel smiled but shook her head. "Nuh, sorry guys but I've already made plans to meet some people."

"That's cool, maybe next time."

Ryan turned to her once they had left. "They call you Chino?"

"Something wrong with that?" Rachel asked as they began to walk toward the cafeteria.

"No," Ryan said unconvincingly. "It's just that I started the whole _Chino_ thing, you know, I had to punch a lot of people to get it. All you have to do is sit through three periods and you're a shoe in."

Rachel laughed. "Don't worry, I'm not taking your rep, I have no intention on beating anyone up...accept for Summer and Anna if I get the chance."

As they entered the cafeteria Ryan spotted the rest of the group already sitting around a table eating. As they moved to sit with their friends Anna instantly took the free seat beside Seth causing Rachel to stop short.

"So what's the hubbub, Bub?" She asked Seth placing her hand on his arm.

"And here I was thinking I was amongst _sane_ people," Summer replied coldly.

Ryan sat himself down next to Marissa and waited to see what his sister was going to do.

Rachel put on a sarcastic smile, knowing that she of all people could beat the girls at their own game. She moved in close to Seth, sitting on his lap and rapping an arm around his neck, giving him a kiss, which lasted a little too long for a hello. Rachel heard Summer huff and Anna sniff, disapproving the action. Wanting to show them that Seth was indeed only hers Rachel shifted her weight slightly on his lap causing him to let out a soft moan. When they finally pulled away both of the girls were looking elsewhere in disgust. Rachel sent a look Ryan's way and he raised his eyebrows, shaking his head but smiling as he did.

"Hey," she whispered to Seth looking down at him.

"_Hello_," he replied, having no problem at all with her actions.

"Aw...isn't this such a Kodak moment," Luke said innocently.

Rachel and Seth looked over at him where he was smiling sweetly, admiring their love for each other.

"It's just so beautiful."

"Um...thanks?" Seth replied.

"So how was class?" Marissa asked Rachel finding amusement in playing with Ryan's hand.

"Same old. Text books, writing, the usual," Rachel replied.

Now that her attention was away from Seth, Summer moved in for the kill.

"Cohen, can you get me a drink?" She asked.

Seth looked down at the full Pepsi bottle in front of her. "You already have a drink Summer."

"But I want another one."

Seth let out a long sigh, not wanting to be rude but at the same time not wanting to do her any favours. He put his hands on Rachel's waist lifting her slightly so he could stand and move away from the chair.

"Where are you going?" Rachel asked sitting in the now vacant spot.

"To get a drink," Seth replied reluctantly.

"To get _me_ a drink," Summer corrected.

Rachel looked at the girl on the opposite side of the table. "Is it really _that_ hard for you to get up and do it yourself?"

"Of course not, but Seth offered."

"I did n..."

"See," Summer said cutting of the 'not' that was about to come out of Seth's mouth.

Everyone knew that Summer was only trying to make Rachel jealous of her, she had been trying this strategy ever since the pair had become an item.

Anna looked up from her history textbook and stood placing it on her seat.

"I'll come with, I wanted something anyway," she said.

Rachel rolled her eyes catching the attention of Ryan who was aware that the girl's attempts to pull her and Seth apart were becoming tiresome.

As the pair walked away Anna began to speak.

"So how are you and Rachel doing?" She asked.

Seth looked at her for a second, not believing that she was genuinely interested in the positives of the relationship.

"We're good."

"You know I always thought you were into brains more than looks."

"What makes you think Rachel doesn't have brains?"

Anna corrected herself unconvincingly. "Oh no, I didn't mean that, it's just that you have a certain...how do I put it? Standard."

Seth remained silent not wanting to comment on anything else that may very well be used against him later.

Rachel watched the pair, as they walked away not noticing how Ryan and Luke swapped seats so that her brother could whisper to her.

"Looks like you've got some competition," he said playfully.

"You think I can't outdo them? _Please_ Ry', think about it. You've got Stick Figure Barbie here and a spokesperson for Planet Arc."

Ryan half laughed. "So you're not worried?"

Rachel was silent for a moment. She _was_ worried but hated herself for it. She knew that Seth was loyal, he had promised her that the incident at Christmas was a once off and that it would never happen again. But despite that...

"I can give as good as I get," she answered turned to face Ryan.

"I know that first hand."

The two shared a smile.

Rachel let out a short sigh and worked the kinks out of her neck.

"Let the games begin," she whispered.

Ryan looked first at Summer and then at Anna and Seth who were now in the line to pay for their items.

He signalled the beginning of the challenge.

"On your marks..."

_**TO BE CONTINUED**_

(Hey guys, I'm back! I hope you liked this chapter and it gave you a little bit of an insight as to where I am taking this story. Don't worry, there are many surprises to come. Please review and all suggestions would be appreciated.)


	2. The Curse

_**THE CURSE**_

_We're being torn apart,_

_What is right with this madness?_

_To feel so unwanted,_

_Just want to feel you._

_Changes_

_Pictured Mind_

A ringing of the phone swept through the house but Seth ignored it as he kissed Rachel harder trying to prove that what Summer and Anna were doing was not going to get in the way of their private life.

_Don't be for me, _he thought to the noise as Rachel rapped her arms around him tighter. _Please don't be for me._

He could feel her beneath him, a comforting heat radiating off her as his hands travelled up and down her body, amazed at how they were restraining themselves from taking the act any further. In usual circumstances the actions would have become much more serious long ago. Both of them losing control.

Rachel let out a slight moan as his lips travelled down her neck.

Suddenly footsteps could be heard on the stairs and a shout came from below.

"Seth!" Kirsten yelled. "It's for you!"

Seth began to pull away slightly but Rachel forced him back. "Don't answer it," she whispered capturing his lips again.

Seth was in no hurry to disagree, it was only when he was called again that they both stopped and looked at each other. Seth rested his forehead on her shoulder for a moment and Rachel let out a sigh.

"Don't go anywhere," he said, pushing off the bed and heading for the door.

"What took you so long?" Kirsten asked as he grabbed the phone from her.

"What do you think?" Sandy asked noticing how Seth's clothes were ruffled.

"Right again dad," Seth replied before putting the phone to his ear and saying hello.

"Seth, it's Anna, how are you?" Came the voice from the other end.

"Anna...hey...um, I'm actually a little busy right now," Seth replied, not wanting to keep Rachel waiting too long. Not wanting to keep _himself_ waiting too long.

"Nice look," Ryan said sarcastically as he walked into the kitchen and flipped open the paper.

"Thanks man," Seth replied whilst trying to listen to Anna's ranting voice and find an opening to intercept the conversation.

"I'm just gonna..." Seth said pointing up the stairs and taking the phone with him.

When he re-entered his room Rachel was sitting with her back leaning against the headboard, her eyes closed.

Seth again tried to tell Anna that he didn't have time for her at the moment.

Rachel mouthed 'who is it?' to him without opening her eyes.

Seth covered the mouthpiece with his hand and whispered.

"Anna."

Rachel let out a sigh as he moved up and sat next to her making every attempt to cut Anna off mid-sentence. Rachel rested her head on Seth's shoulder and began to say things with every intention of Anna hearing them.

"Seth, baby, come back to bed," she whispered into the mouthpiece.

Seth couldn't help but smile at this. Rachel took hold of the blanket and scrunched it up near the phone giving the impression that someone was moving around under the covers.

"Don't you want me to show you what I was going to do?"

She was smiling now, having trouble not outright laughing. Seth let out a grunt trying to smother his amusement but only succeeded in catching Anna's attention.

"What are you doing?" She asked.

"Playing soccer," Seth answered.

"Come on Seth, I'm sure it's not _that_ important. Have a little fun."

"Oh I'm having fun alright," he replied.

Anna was quiet for a moment. "It's good to know you care about other people's feelings too."

"Anna...I do care about your feelings."

This comment made Rachel stop smiling.

"Anna I _really_ have to go," Seth insisted. "We can talk later."

He didn't wait for her reply before he hung up the phone.

"She honestly couldn't take the hint?" She asked.

"Clearly not," Seth replied setting the phone down on the bedside table. "Now, where were we?"

He rolled himself into his earlier position and kissed Rachel again but this time she pulled away.

"You don't care about them, right?" She asked.

"No way," Seth replied bringing his lips down to her neck.

"I'm serious!" Rachel exclaimed pushing him away slightly.

Seth leaned on his elbows and looked down into her eyes. He loved her so much that not even words could explain the feeling. Seeing her lying there beneath him made him think of all of the times that they had been through in the past. All the ups and downs, but most of all, all of the moments where they had expressed their love for each other.

Seth smiled. "Would I be here if they did?"

His lips again met hers and they were thrown back into their earlier actions, lost in each others touch.

* * *

The doorbell rang and Kirsten went to answer it leaving Sandy in frustration as he tried to solve his crossword puzzle. Ryan had retired to the pool house only moments before.

When she opened the door she was greeted by the toothy grin of Summer.

"Hi Mrs. Cohen," she said cheerfully.

"Summer," Kirsten replied shocked. "Hello, it's good to see you."

"Is Seth home?"

"Um..." Kirsten took a moment to answer, thinking of Seth's rushed conversation and eagerness to be left alone before. "Yes, he's upstairs."

She stepped out of the way and Summer past by giving Sandy a little wave as she headed for the stairs.

"Is it just me or is Seth attracting more attention of the female kind lately?" Kirsten asked as she again joined Sandy.

"It's not just you. All I can say is Seth better be careful because he has something great with Rachel, and he wouldn't want to ruin that," Sandy said.

Summer heard them before she saw them, the soft moans of the two behind the closed door. She had enough experience to tell the difference though and from her judgement, nothing overly serious was happening between the two.

Summer took in a deep breath and flung the door open.

"Hi all!" She cried.

Seth practically flew off Rachel landing beside her and looking at Summer in disbelief.

"Summer, what are you doing here?" He asked.

"Just thought I'd pop in and see how you two were doing. I'm clearly seeing that Rachel enjoys fresh meat."

"You're a bitch Summer," Rachel replied. "We were _great_ until a second ago," she used her thumb to dramatically wipe the side of her lip

"That's nice," Summer said walking into the room and jumping onto the bed with them. "So Seth, how are you?"

Rachel raised her eyebrows not believing that the girl was doing this. Didn't she have any decency?

_This is Summer we're talking about. Of course not._

"I'm gonna go," Rachel said to Seth moving to climb off the bed.

"Wh-where are you going?" Seth stammered.

"To talk to Ry'. Don't worry, you guys have _fun_."

Seth could tell by the sound of her voice that the new arrival, and his complete lack of trying to get her to leave did not impress her.

* * *

Ryan was now in the pool house finishing his shower, the blinds down so he could change in peace when Rachel barged in speaking frantically. He froze in the middle of the room, only a towel around his waist and watched as she walked in unfazed and dropped onto the bed.

"I can't believe her!" She cried. "That girl has some nerve walking in and taking over the damn place."

She fell back onto her elbows before noticing Ryan's obvious bewilderment.

"What?"

He looked at her and then down at the towel that he was now clutching as though his life depended on it.

"Oh, come on Ry' grow up."

Ryan raised an eyebrow and stood there waiting for her to exit and allow him to change. Instead Rachel lay down on her back and continued her rant.

"And Anna just _had_ to call at that exact moment. I swear those two have completely planned out this whole thing. Used hidden camera's and everything, just so they can catch us at the right moment."

By this stage Ryan had slipped out into the back room mumbling about how he would never figure his sister out and put on a pair of jeans. He walked back into the room bare chested with two shirts in his hands. Rachel was still talking about how much she hated the girls at the moment when her brother held out the clothes to her. She took one look at the garments and pointed to the one on the left, which resulted in him slipping it on and throwing the other one at her playfully.

"Calm down Rach, take a breath," he said sitting down with her.

"Ry' you don't get it," she said, her voice now almost sad. "This always happens. I find a guy and then he finds something more interesting."

"Seth doesn't find Summer _or_ Anna more interesting than you."

"It feels like he does. Every five seconds something about them comes up or they walk into the room. God this is _The Curse_ working wonders."

Ryan tilted his head. "Curse?"

"Yeah. You know? You find someone, you fall in love, someone else moves in on it, they catch your persons eye and _wham_, bye-bye love life."

"That's an interesting way to look at it...a little depressing."

"That's the way it goes, _every_ time." She sat up and looked at Ryan. "Think about it. How many times have my relationships ended in the past because someone came in and busted them up?"

Ryan thought for a moment and then realised that the number was quite high.

"See what I mean?"

He stood from the bed and went to get a glass of water for her talking as he did.

"I think you're just paranoid. You know as well as I do that Seth is different from the guys you dated in Chino."

"Yeah, he isn't in your gang," Rachel said bluntly.

Ryan returned to the bed and sat back noticing how she was pulling at the buttons on his spare shirt in frustration. He took it out of her hands before she tore it in two. Handing over the glass of water he let out a small sigh.

"So you honestly have that little trust in Seth?"

Rachel looked up at him frowning. "I trust Seth. I _don't_ trust the girls. Unlike you I happen to remember a certain Christmas in which I found him kissing Wonder Woman while Comic Book Making Girl watched. In what twisted way does that not give me enough reason to be worried?"

Ryan placed his hand on her shoulder. "Just calm down. Nothing is happening yet and believe me, it won't _start_ happening. In some part of your mind you must know that because you left them _alone_ upstairs together."

Rachel eyes went wide realising that her brother was right. She went to leave but Ryan stopped her.

"You're gonna trust him," he insisted.

Rachel reluctantly stopped and took a sip of water. "If he cheats, I'm blaming you," she said.

Ryan shook his head and smiled. "No, you'll blame _The Curse_," he replied teasing her.

Rachel hit him.

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Hope you guys like it. Next chapter things start to get a bit more interesting because Caleb and Julie arrive and aren't very happy with what's going on at the Cohen's house. Please review.)


	3. The Impression

_**THE IMPRESSION**_

_Should be easy enough,  
To know a heartache in disguise.  
But the heart rules the mind,  
And the going gets rough.  
Pride takes the fall._

_That Kind Of Love_

_Alison Krauss  
_

"So when are they coming?" Sandy asked Kirsten whilst she busily buttered her toast for breakfast.

"This afternoon, once the kids get out of school," she replied.

"Okay then," Sandy said as Rachel walked into the room, her hand covering the yawn, which stretched across her mouth. "I'll make sure I have to work late."

"Isn't that a bad thing?" Rachel asked as she opened the fridge and pulled the orange juice from inside.

"Not when we're talking about Julie Cooper and Caleb Nickel."

Rachel half laughed pouring herself a glass. "Julie Cooper I get, but who's Caleb?"

Sandy looked at Kirsten who in turn looked at Rachel. "My father."

Rachel frowned. "What's so bad about...?" She suddenly realised what was going on. "Oh, I get it. He's the evil father in-law, right?"

"The one and only," Sandy answered.

"And he's going out with Julie?"

Sandy nodded.

"Well I can cross him off as someone who will grow to like me," Rachel stated.

"Don't be silly, I'm sure he will find that you are a great person," Kirsten insisted.

"Not when he knows Julie Cooper he won't. Plus isn't he old enough to be her father?"

Sandy smiled at the comment and shot a sarcastic look at Kirsten who only looked down.

"And if they got married she would be your step-mother."

Rachel stood silently for a moment thinking about what she had just said. An obvious shudder ran through her body.

"That's scary."

"What's scary?" Seth asked as he walked into the room, bag slung over his shoulder. "Ooh, juice." He took Rachel's full glass and downed the entire thing.

She tilted her head and stared at the now empty glass one eyebrow raised. Seth stood still for a while not quite sure why she was...

_Oh..._he thought.

Seth re-filled her glass with a sheepish grin and returned the juice carton to the fridge.

"We were just talking about Julie and Caleb coming around later," Sandy said.

Seth moved behind Rachel and rapped his arms around her waist. "You get to meet Gramps. He's an awesome guy, you'll love him."

"I'm more worried about him not loving me," Rachel replied wriggling out of his grasp.

The movement caught Seth's attention. She never did that. Never moved away from his touch unless...

She couldn't still be mad about the Summer, Anna thing, could she?

* * *

Late that afternoon Rachel sat on the floor at the foot of Seth's bed rubbing her eyes in frustration. Despite only just beginning her education at Harbor, already she had been bombarded with work to complete in order for her to catch up with the rest of the class.

_Half this stuff you don't use in real life anyway_, she thought, throwing down her pen in anger.

"I give up," she murmured.

She closed the textbook and leaned her head back against the bed. Any minute now Seth would come waltzing in with a new Cohen for her to meet and she had no doubt that they would not approve of her. Right now she wasn't in the mood for socialising.

Summer and Anna were still seeing through their plan to make her life a living hell and so far – much to her dislike – they were succeeding. Rachel couldn't remember the last time she and Seth had been so distant from each other. So torn apart.

"Rach I want you to meet someone," Seth said as he appearing in the doorway.

_And so it begins_.

* * *

"Gramps this is my girlfriend Rachel, Ryan's sister."

Seth stood between Rachel and his grandfather as the rest of the family watched what would happen between the two.

"Nice to meet you," Rachel said offering her hand.

Caleb took it with a little too much resistance. "I'm sure it is."

Rachel frowned and sent a sarcastic smile Sandy's way, receiving an I-told-you-so nod in return.

"He's a funny one," Seth said with a fake enthusiasm.

He knew fare well that Caleb's immediate impression of Rachel would not be a good one, not after learning that she was the sister of the boy who burned down one of his prestigious model homes.

"You're the girl Julie keeps going on about," Caleb voiced, looking Rachel up and down. "I can see why she wishes to have you out of this town so fast. Ryan is the only one of your people that I think can change and make something of themselves. I can already tell that you are going to amount to nothing."

Rachel's eyes flashed red, but as she went to say something in her defence when Kirsten stepped in.

"How about we have some dinner," she said.

"You didn't cook, did you?" Caleb asked rudely.

"No dad."

The family began to move toward the kitchen but Rachel stayed where she was, watching Caleb as he moved about the home as though he ruled it. She could already tell that he would be a sly bastard to be around.

Sandy stopped when he noticed that Rachel was not following them.

"Are you coming?" He asked with a look of apology on his face for Caleb's behaviour.

"I'm not hungry," she said. "Plus I have homework anyway, so I'll just..."

Rachel turned and headed for the stairs leaving a regretful Sandy in her wake.

* * *

The weekend couldn't have some quick enough as Rachel sleepily walked down the stairs and into the kitchen. She was still not fully awake and only came to her full attention when she went to get a glass from the back of a cupboard and couldn't reach.

"Stupid cupboard," she mumbled angrily.

But her anger didn't come from the fact that her height had let her down, but rather that she wasn't able to defend herself against Caleb's wrath the previous night.

A hand reached up and pulled the glass from its spot putting it on the counter in front of her.

"_I_ built those 'stupid cupboards'," Caleb said from beside her.

Rachel was instantly filled with the want to knock him out right then and there. She didn't think she had felt this much anger toward a single person ever.

Instead she turned to face him fixing her top back into its original place after it had creeped up her back whilst she was stretching. She noticed how Caleb had been eyeing off the newest addition to her tattoo's, one which Seth had picked out for her not too long ago. A tribal sun, the left side dark, the right side light – continuing her theme – was inked into the flesh at the small of her back.

"And I like them, _really_," she voiced with a shrill of sarcasm. "Some people really know how to discriminate against short people."

Caleb looked her up and down. "That's a big word from someone from _your_ land."

"_My_ land? I'm American, Caleb."

"I meant the place you're from," he corrected rudely.

"You have an issue with Chino?" Rachel asked knowing already that he obviously did.

Caleb visibly shuddered. "Horrid place, no doubt where you had all that colour done," he said pointing to her wrists where more tattoo's could just be made out.

"For your information some of these were done in New Port."

"In some run down shack."

"What the hell is your problem?" Rachel asked her voice rising a little.

Caleb dismissed the comment and continued with his own. "Does Seth approve?"

"Approve?"

"Does he _accept_ them?"

"I know what it means you idiot, and yeah, he even picked the sun out for me." Rachel placed her hands on her hips challengingly.

Caleb continued to stare at her, his eyes strong against hers. "And how long have you two been seeing each other?"

"That's none of your business."

"So you're just staying here to vegetate, take all of Kitti's money and then take off to the next poor family?"

Rachel had to hold herself back to prevent a full explosion of insults to come tumbling out of her mouth. She took in a deep breath and faced him head on.

"Are you done?"

There they stayed for a moment, staring, sizing each other up. Caleb was thinking of all the possible ways in which he could destroy the girl, make her life a hell she couldn't even imagine. A small smile crept along his face.

"Cal!" Came Julie Cooper's voice from the hallway.

"Just what I need," Rachel mumbled. 

She appeared in the kitchen seconds later, the smile she wore instantly disappearing when she saw Rachel standing there.

"And that rude girl from Chino," she finished coldly.

"We were just discussing that," Caleb stated.

"No we weren't," Rachel challenged but neither of them were listening to her.

"Did you know she was pregnant not that long ago and had it terminated?" Julie asked Caleb, her voice a whisper and yet Rachel could still hear ever word she said loud and clear.

"You don't want to go there," Rachel said, her voice low.

"Was it Seth's?" Caleb asked not noticing her obvious uncomfortable state. "Did you force him?"

"_Force_...? What the hell?"

"And poor Seth, not wanting to hurt her, just keeps playing along with their little love story," Julie said shaking her head and moving up next to Caleb.

"Just like his mother," Caleb answered thinking of his daughter's marriage to Sandy.

"You can't talk about your own daughter that way!" Rachel yelled.

"You can't talk about my mother like, how?" Seth asked walking into the room.

Caleb and Julie instantly smiled as they noticed the new arrival causing Rachel to fume. She could tell that they were trying to fake their way out of any questions that may arise as to how she became this angry.

"We were just discussing matters with dear Rachel," Julie said as Seth rapped his arms around his girlfriend's waist from behind.

"What matters?" He asked.

"How it's fun to leave a conversation when people are being complete hypocrites!" Rachel yelled as she turned and stormed out.

"That's a long word for _her_ people," Julie commented.

"That's what I was saying before," Caleb answered.

"Rach...wait," Seth began but she was already gone.

* * *

Ryan sat on his bed, watching Rachel as she paced back and forth in complete frustration.

"I hate this town sometimes!" She screamed

"Don't we all?" He replied calmly.

"And there's Caleb and Julie talking like they own the damn place!"

"You spoke to Caleb?" Ryan asked sitting up a little straighter and looking strongly at her.

Rachel moved over and flopped down on the bed beside him letting out a sarcastic sigh.

"Oh yeah, we had a _great_ heart to heart," she exclaimed sarcastically.

"Clearly it wasn't _that_ great."

Rachel fell onto her back and Ryan looked down at her as she let out an anger filled growl.

"God, do people _ever_ see past Chino when they look at you?"

"Why?" Ryan asked lying beside he, propping his elbow up so he could rest his head on his hand. "What did they say?"

"I dunno," Rachel said with defeat. "I just think I expected this to go _too_ well."

"You'll be alright, just let things settle down," Ryan said brushing of hair which had escaped her pony tail away from her face.

"Then they'll think of another one of Rachel's wacky, fun facts to _slam_ in my face."

"Fact?" Ryan said unsure.

"Yeah, apparently the baby was Seth's and I had an abortion because that's what we '_Chino'_ people do," she said, a bitterness covering her words.

Ryan hated seeing Rachel remember the pain she went through when she lost her baby mere months ago. Despite the terrible circumstances at which it was created, he knew that she had wanted to keep it as her own.

"W-was it...?"

"Was it what?" Rachel asked.

"Seth's?"

Rachel sat bolt upright and looked at Ryan with disgust in her eyes. "_What_?"

Ryan sat up and met her gaze. "Well I always just _assumed_ that it was Marsal's, I never really knew for sure."

"It _was_ Marsal's. Remember? He _raped_ me at Julie's party. Seth and I aren't stupid enough for something like that to happen. We avoid it at all costs."

Ryan was silent now, a little regretful that he had asked what he did. "So..." He began. "You don't sleep together – in the sex kinda way?"

Rachel frowned at him, not understanding where these questions were coming from.

"Since when have you had a problem with me having sex?"

Ryan shook his head. "I don't...well...just as long as it's the right guy."

"Seth _is_ the right guy. He's also a smart one who knows how _not_ to have his girlfriend fall pregnant." Rachel rolled her eyes. "Are you going to pull off a mask and turn out to be Caleb?"

Ryan shrugged a little uncomfortably. "Sorry..."

Rachel let out a sigh, knowing that her brother had not meant any harm by his questions. She knew he loved her, that he was protective – sometimes too much for her own good.

"It's just..." Rachel began, her voice calm now. "I _really_ care about Seth, you know that. So when people start to talk it's like..."

"Where's the nearest door?"

Both Ryan and Rachel looked up to see Seth standing in the doorway leaning against the frame a troubled look on his face.

"Something like that," Rachel said looking down.

Seth stepped into the room more and dropped into the couch opposite the bed. "Enter my family. Exit my girlfriend."

"Who's pretty damn pissed right now," Rachel stated but her voice was no longer filled with anger.

Ryan looked from Rachel to Seth and then back again, still sensing a strong tension between them. It had been slowly developing since Rachel had started school and Summer and Anna had begun their never ending schemes to pull the couple apart. Clearly it was working.

"And that's my cue to leave," Ryan said getting up from the bed.

Rachel pulled him back down. "No, stay, neither of us have any to hide."

_Unless he's getting a bit of Summer or Anna on the side_, she thought. Rachel felt her heart sink at the thought.

"What is Caleb's problem?" She asked.

"He's just not used to people like you two," Seth said before instantly regretting his choice of words.

"Like _us_?" Rachel asked irritably.

"No, I didn't mean..." Seth looked at Ryan. "Feel free to jump in any time."

"I'll take that into account," Ryan replied with a smile.

"Okay, that's the last time I help you with your English homework," Seth stated.

Ryan instantly turned to his sister. "So Rach, how about you stop being mad at Seth?"

"Yeah Rach, what do you say?"

Rachel looked at the people before her. The two young men who would lay their lives down on the line for her. Who had always been there, no matter how terrible the situation.

"I say you'd better do something about him before things turn serious and there's one less member of this family to worry about."

And with that she walked out.

The boys sat in silent for a moment not really knowing quite what to say in response to Rachel's departure.

Seth nodded his head. "Noted."

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Hey hey! Hope you enjoyed the chapter. This is pretty much where the story starts to kick off, a lot of which will revolve around Rachel's deteriorating relationships with the other characters – not just Seth – and also to some pretty serious consequences. Please review and I will be posting soon.)


	4. The Rivals

_**THE RIVALS**_

_Stay alert cos I'm obsessed_

_Surely I can't be depressed_

_Do u feel the same anyway_

_Now you've come_

_Do You Feel The Same?_

_Silverchair_

Rachel had now locked herself in the room she shared with Seth not wanting to talk to anyone at the moment, especially not Caleb and Julie who had now congregated downstairs for a talk with Sandy and Kirsten.

Seth had come to check on her three times now, and each time he received the same response.

"I don't want to talk."

Rachel wasn't regretting in the least what she had warned her brother and boyfriend of in the pool house earlier that day. If things kept up the way they were going, war was going to erupt inside the house.

.........

"I honestly thought there would be _more_ to her than stick and bone. Where is the substance?" Caleb asked as he took another sip of his coffee.

Sandy sat across from him trying his hardest not to hit the man who was insulting a child he considered his own.

He watched Julie who was positioned next to Caleb, her head bopping up and down in agreement with her partner

Sandy bit his tongue and sat there in silence while Kirsten spoke.

"Dad, don't speak about Rachel that way, she is a great child to have around the house and if you only gave her the benefit of the doubt you would see that as well," Kirsten stated strongly.

"I am not judging anyone on false facts. I happen to know that the people who come out of _that_ town are no good to keep around. They should all be locked up and have the key destroyed."

"I completely agree with Cal. What can this girl honestly offer this town?" Julie asked snobbishly.

"The exact same things that you can. You should talk to her, she is one of the smartest fifteen year olds I have ever met."

Kirsten's voice was now becoming louder as she tried to drum her points into her opponent's heads.

"That is ridiculous Kikki and you know it. I'm sure given some time Seth will know it too. I honestly don't know what's going through his mind at the moment, thinking that she is the right one for him." Caleb stated.

Kirsten let out a long sigh. "This is getting old Dad."

"No, what is getting old is you two thinking that just because you are good citizens and take in another child, you know all the consequences that will come out of it. You saw her last year, she completely unpredictable, one minute fine, the next, she's run away." Julie sat up straighter thinking she had made a nice impact with her words.

"If you went through what she had to last year you would have done the same thing."

"Personally I think she is a waist of space, throw her out and let her rot," Caleb said dismissingly.

"That's it!"

Sandy yelled rising from his chair so quickly that it was knocked over. He slammed his fists down on the table and looked directly at Caleb.

"If you think that you can come into _my_ house and insult _my_ kid then you have another thing coming!"

Caleb only smiled at the outburst. "She is not _your_ kid."

"She damn well is," Sandy growled, his voice low and menacing. "I _love_ her like my own and I will _protect_ her like my own from stupid, mislead, rich bastards like _you_!"

A silence swept over the room, no one moving, no one speaking.

"Do you have anything else to say before you _leave_?"

Julie stood from her place calmly and looked at Sandy. "Getting her out of this town will do us all a favour."

"Interesting notion, care to offer another?" Sandy asked sarcastically.

Julie stared at him for a moment before Caleb stood up and took her arm. "We're leaving, I don't need to be insulted like this."

"Yeah well now you know how it feels. Let the door hit you in the ass on the way out."

And with that they left, leaving Kirsten to look at Sandy shocked.

"What?" He asked innocently.

"You were amazing," She replied.

"I know."

Kirsten let out a long sigh. "I can't believe that this is happening. I honestly thought he had a little more decency than that."

"We'll figure it out. Nothing will happen to Rachel or this family, not as long as I have something to say about it."

.........

The school week came around faster than anyone could have predicted and soon Ryan found himself wondering up and down the hallways of Harbor again trying to find his History teacher.

"Mr. Atwood, you have been looking for me?"

Ryan nearly jumped out of his skin when the booming voice erupted from behind him. Instead he turned around calmly and looked at the towering man before him.

"Mr. Proctor, uh...yeah I have been," he replied.

The man stood a good three inches taller than Ryan, with jet black hair and a long beard. If Ryan didn't know better he'd say that the man had been pulled straight out of the eighties.

"Well, what is it you wanted?"

"Oh..."

Ryan dropped his bag to the floor and unzipped the back pocket, pulling out a set of five pieces of paper, neatly stapled together.

"Assignment on the Cold War," he said handing over the paper.

Mr. Proctor looked at the paper as thought it were covered in germs and reluctantly took it from his, folding it in half and placing it in the folder he held.

"Three days late, Mr. Atwood. You know there will be a loss of marks because of this."

"I understand," Ryan said, wanting more than ever to walk away.

He didn't have to however because Mr. Proctor took one last look at him before turning on his heal and gliding away. Ryan hated his History teacher, always thinking that he was better than everyone else, especially transfer students from Chino.

Ryan hoped that Rachel wouldn't have a run in with him in the future, knowing that the encounter would not be a pleasant one.

"Ryan, hey," Marissa said walking up to him and lightly kissing him on the lips.

"Hey."

"Where have you been, I've been looking all over for you."

Ryan let his eyes wonder for a moment. "Here mostly."

"I heard what happened with Rachel and my mum. I'm so sorry."

Marissa looked down slightly and Ryan could see the utter resentment she had toward her mother at the moment. The encounter had not only been hurtful to there relationship but it had also shown just how truly different they were.

"It's okay, Rach is dealing."

"She is?"

"Well if you can call locking yourself in a room and not talking to anyone dealing."

Ryan shrugged sheepishly with a lopsided grin on his face. He didn't want Marissa to feel sorry about what had happened – what _was_ happening. She had nothing to do with it.

"I can just tell that this is going to get ugly. I don't want something to happen to Rachel."

Ryan placed his hands on her shoulders. "Hey, Rach is a big girl, she can handle herself. Plus I'm here. Sandy, Kirsten and Seth too. Even Luke is offering to help."

Marissa looked shocked. "Luke?"

"Yeah, he's taken a liking to Rach."

She looked strongly at him.

"Not in _that_ kind of way," Ryan insisted. "Everything will be fine."

Marissa smiled then, Ryan's reassuring words helping her deal with the intense guilt that she was feeling.

"You know you go deeper than most people think."

Ryan looked deep within her eyes, seeing that she was being truly honest with him.

"Only around certain individuals," he said playfully.

Marissa smiled at that and leaned in against him. Ryan slipped his arms around her and rested his head atop hers. She liked being like this with him, when no words were spoken, no kisses, just him holding her as though she was the most precious thing in the world.

Marissa could stay like this forever.

.........

Summer saw her out in the garden, crossing the path, which lead back into the cafeteria. She was alone, an unusual thing to occur, especially whilst in school hours. There was no Seth Cohen draped over her arm. No herd of friends which she had quickly developed – almost too quickly for Summer's liking.

Rachel was alone.

Summer made her way down the stairs and intercepted her quickly before anyone could interrupt them.

"Rachel I..." Summer began.

The minute that Rachel spotted her she rolled her eyes and went to walk past but Summer blocked her path.

"What Summer?" Rachel snapped.

Summer wasn't sure how to put it into words, she wasn't used to admitting when she was wrong, especially not to the new girl.

"I just like wanted to say..." She began.

"You wanted to say...?"

"I'm sorry about everything that's happened lately, with Mrs. Cooper and Caleb. I think it's totally unfair."

Rachel looked at her and spoke with sarcasm. "Oh, wow, there is a heart in there."

Summer stood silently.

"Is that all?"

When she made no reply Rachel pushed past her and began her original journey again.

"You know you _so_ don't deserve him with that attitude," Summer stated.

Rachel stopped in her tracks and turned again. "What?"

"You don't deserve Seth if you're going to be like that. And you're totally jealous because I do."

"I personally think jealousy is only for those who don't have the _balls_ to go out and get what they want. So instead they make stupid attempts at destroying things that other people have for their own gain."

Summer raised her eyebrows at the comment. "I think I could challenge that theory."

Rachel took a step closer. "You wanna fight? Get in line. I already have enough people coming down on me lately."

Summer nodded her head sadly. "I know, and I'm sorry, like I said, and..."

"And what?"

"I was wondering, you know, if like, we could call a truce or something."

Rachel was stunned, she honestly had not expected the remark, especially not from Summer.

"You want to be friends?"

Summer shrugged. "Yeah, well, we are totally similar, especially with the whole Seth thing, and you're friends with my friends so...maybe we should, try and, like, get along."

Rachel couldn't make out words, she was in too much shock. Eventually she was able to string a sentence together.

"But you tried to break me and Seth up, now you want to be buds?"

"Uh-huh."

"This is going to get ugly."

"No way, totally the opposite. I'm _so_ over Cohen."

"But you were just saying..."

"That doesn't matter," Summer insisted. "I've trained myself well in the art of forgetting him, or whatever. I kept saying 'think un-Cohen thoughts, think un-Cohen thoughts' and it worked."

Rachel frowned at the comment not believing Summer in the slightest. Only a moment ago she was insisting that she the right companion for Seth and now she wanted to be best friends.

"I know that you'd be totally happy to not have me being a complete bitch around you and Cohen," she said trying to get Rachel to agree to her offer. "And even though Anna might still try and break you up just be happy that I won't. I totally give you my blessing."

_Has she gone completely insane?_ Rachel thought.

"Unless you break up, because then I am _so_ moving in on him."

_Nope, it's still her_.

_TO BE CONTINUED........._

(Hey, hope you liked this chapter. At the request of a few ppl I did change my original plan to have Summer continue being a bi-atch so now she won't be _as much_. In the next chapter things start to get very heated – in the clean kinda way – between Rachel, Caleb and Julie as they reveal their plans for her. The stress of everything that has been happening starts to weigh down on the Seth/ Rach Ryan/Rach relationships. Please review.)


	5. The Sever

**_THE SEVER_**

_I'm filling up inside like I need to open wide_

_And pour my heart out to you._

_But I'll just be denied and all I wanted was someone_

_To hear what I'm going through._

_Never There_

_Hoobastank_

Seth watched her from the doorway as she threw books into her bag at a rapid and angry pace.

He stepped into the room, careful not to get in the way.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

Rachel didn't acknowledge him, she didn't even flinch, just kept doing what she was doing.

"Rach, you wanna talk?"

"About what Seth?" Rachel finally said looking up. "About how your grandfather is making my life hell? Or do you wanna talk about how Summer gave us her _blessing_?"

Rachel threw the last of her books into her bag before stopping short when she realised what she had done. Seth was only trying to help, but if that was true, then why did she think he was only making things worse. Seth wasn't like Ryan, he couldn't read what was going on inside her head by simply looking into her eyes. He wasn't someone who thought of the bad things when there were good as well.

"Seth I..." Rachel said looking up again, but he was gone.

Rachel let out a long sigh, before hearing noises downstairs. Marissa had arrived to take them to school and she could hear the faint chatter of her and Ryan. The front door slammed and another voice joined the conversation but Rachel couldn't make out whom it belonged to.

Suddenly there were loud footsteps running up the stairs and Seth appeared again.

"Anna's here to take us to school," he said.

Rachel heard the joy he had in his voice when he said Anna's name and her heart sank from the feeling.

"What happened to Marissa?" Rachel asked lifting her bag over her shoulder.

"Her and Ryan are leaving a bit earlier because they have to pick some books up or something."

Rachel looked at Seth, really looked at him. She couldn't believe what she was hearing, his movements, his face; everything changed when he spoke of Anna. His entire body loosened something that had only happened when Rachel was around.

"Seth..." She began.

"Are you guys coming?" Anna yelled from the bottom floor.

"Seth..." Rachel tried again.

"Come on, we're gonna be late," Seth said turning and disappearing down the hall.

Rachel stood alone in his room completely empty of thought. Nothing was registering. Seth had chosen Anna over her, and Rachel could feel every part of her aching because of it. Her chest hurt, like someone had taken a knife and sliced her heart open.

She looked down at the floor forcing back the tear, which threatened to escape her eye. Instead she took in a deep breath and moved to the door, knowing that this was only the beginning.

Moving out of the room, down the stairs and into the lobby Rachel saw her brother and Marissa whispering in the corner, Anna and Seth in a heated conversation about comics.

"You know, you guys go ahead, I'll catch up," she said, only then getting their attention.

"What are you talking about?" Marissa asked.

Rachel looked at her, then at Ryan's who was clearly aware that something wasn't right.

"Why don't you ride with us?" He asked.

Rachel took a moment to think about the suggestion and then agreed, knowing full well that this would mean that Seth and Anna would be left alone in the car together.

Part of her honestly didn't care.

Marissa looked at Ryan and then Seth and Anna. "Uh...I might go with these two, let you guys have some time alone to talk."

She moved over near Seth causing Anna to roll her eyes in frustration.

* * *

"Are you okay?" Ryan asked taking his eyes off the road for a moment to look at his silent sister.

Rachel shrugged. "I dunno."

"Wow, that tells me a lot."

Rachel cast a glance over to him. "Seth likes Anna."

"Seth likes a lot of people."

Rachel shook her head. "This is different, he...he chose her over me before. I went to talk and all that he could worry about was that we would keep Anna waiting."

"He probably didn't mean it _that_ way," Ryan reassured.

"Everyone wants me gone," she whispered.

"No one wants you gone."

"That's not what it feels like. Even you, you haven't stood up for me with Caleb and Julie _once_. What happened to the 'no one messes with my family' speech?"

"Going up against the evil un-dead wasn't on my to-do list."

Rachel looked over to him, his eyes focused on the road as he drove, hands clasped tightly around the wheel.

"You honestly don't care, do you?"

"I do care..."

"Then it would be nice if you showed it."

Rachel voice was now strong, almost accusing as she practically told Ryan that it felt as though he had given up on her.

"What do you want me to do? Throw a ticket tape parade in your name?"

"Wanna be careful there, you're gonna blow up the sarcasm meter."

"Rach, I care about you, I don't have to prove that." Ryan was yelling now, the frustration setting in hard.

Rachel fell silent. She was fighting with _Ryan_ now. What was going to be next? Nothing was working out for her lately. First Caleb and Julie and now everything surrounding her relationship with Seth. She felt so lost. More than anything she just wanted to open up and tell her brother how she was feeling, but for some reason she couldn't. She couldn't tell him anything. It felt as though he wasn't there, even now, when they sat side by side, he was gone.

As Ryan pulled the car to a stop outside the school he climbed out leaving Rachel sitting there.

"Hey I think you left your 'I'm an ass-wipe' sign in the car," she called out to him.

Ryan turned around and looked at her, seeing that she truly didn't mean what she had said.

"Get out," were the only words that escaped his lips.

Rachel glared at him before stubbornly collecting her bag and stepping out of the car. She began to walk away only to hear Ryan call out to her.

"I'll meet you..."

He stopped when he realised she wasn't listening. She was doing exactly what he had been only minutes before.

* * *

Later that afternoon once school was out Jimmy sat alone in the Cohen's house waiting for Sandy to return from his business call. He looked around the lounge thinking of how he used to have these things, the big house, loving family, everything a man could want. Now he had nothing, only the hope of leaving this life behind and starting over.

"Uh...hi."

Jimmy looked up to see a young girl standing there a pair of jeans draped over her arm.

"Hi," he replied. "Jimmy," he introduced.

"Name to the face. I've heard a lot about you. I'm Rachel."

"I second that 'name to the face' thing."

Rachel smiled and Jimmy felt as though he was in the presence of an angel. She was truly beautiful, a natural strength in her golden eyes as they came to rest on his. He could see the small similarities between her and Ryan. The way their eyes bore into your soul, the slight smile that was always just waiting to awaken.

"So...you're here, why?" Rachel asked politely.

"Oh, having a talk with Sandy. I'm desperate for advice I need on some stuff."

Rachel looked at him and shrugged. "What kinda stuff?"

"Business. Personal..."

"Well I just walked past him and they're talking about football on the phone. He might be a while."

Jimmy looked down slightly. "That's okay, I'll just come back later."

He stood from the couch and made his way to the door when he heard Rachel behind him.

"You know I have nothing to do right now, maybe I could help."

Jimmy turned and looked at her before smiling. "Are you sure."

"Hey," she said sitting on the couch he had just vacated. "Beats homework."

Jimmy laughed. "You don't know anything about me."

"Means I haven't made my judgement, I have an open mind."

Jimmy looked at the young girl sitting there expectantly on the couch and instantly thought of his own daughters. Maybe he did need advice – or even just to talk to someone who didn't know him. Who didn't have a biased opinion.

He started pacing slightly.

"Where do I start?" He asked.

"Wherever you like."

Jimmy took in a deep breath. "I've made some bad choices..."

"Join the club buddy."

"No, I mean _really _bad mistakes."

"So do I."

Jimmy stopped then and cast a glance Rachel's way. Her face was filled with curiosity and an honest nature.

"I've lost everything. My family, my job, my friends. I'm having to start from scratch without anything to get me going."

Rachel looked up then, hearing the words passing through another's mouth made her think of herself. She has been thrust into a new world with nothing to hold onto, no friends, no protective circle. The only person she had was her brother.

The thought of Ryan made Rachel take in a deep breath and she forced him from her mind.

"You're scared?" Rachel asked honestly.

Jimmy stared into her face, one of such innocence but she also carried a wisdom of life experience.

"Yeah," he murmured.

"You don't think that you'll be able to work things out?"

He shook his head in agreement.

"Seems like every face you see is a stranger, and you don't know who to trust, or what's around the next corner. You don't know how long this life will last or if you'll ever escape it."

Jimmy was frowning now. "Are we still talking about me?"

Rachel let on a weak smile. "Kinda."

He moved over to the couch with her. "So what about you? Tell me your problems."

Rachel instantly rose from the couch and walked into the middle of the room trying to avoid all conversation surrounding her feelings. She didn't want to open up; part of her felt as though she couldn't. Not to Ryan, not to Seth, not even Sandy or Kirsten. Especially not a complete stranger who knew nothing about her previous life, only what he heard through people.

"We're not talking about me."

Jimmy instantly noticed that she had bypassed the question. "Okay..."

Rachel cracked her knuckles loudly trying to shake the sudden tension, which now racked her body.

"What's your diagnosis?" Jimmy asked.

"You're in denial. You think that you can't start your new life where your old one left off and that's bull."

"This town isn't exactly forgiving."

"This town offers second chances, but only to those you _seek them out_. You're sitting there feeling sorry for yourself like someone will show up in your life and give you all the answers. Take it from me. They won't. No sign will appear and point to where you have to go. You have to get off your ass and become whatever the hell it is you want to be."

"That's what I don't know."

"It doesn't matter Jimmy. The point is to have faith in the people, which are around you and know that no matter what happens they'll support you. But not if you don't make an effort."

Jimmy almost laughed. "I can't believe I'm taking advice from a fifteen year old."

"Sometimes it takes the person you'd least expect to tell you if you don't do something you're screwed – and I say that in the nicest way."

"I'll bet. Maybe you should be taking some of your own advice though. Trusting people to help you along, that kind of thing."

Rachel only stared at him. He had seen it. Seen the way, which she had spoken as though she wanted to believe it herself but for some reason couldn't.

For some reason, she just couldn't.

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Hey. Okay maybe I lied, you don't find out what Caleb and Julie have planned till next chapter. I didn't think that this one was going to go for so long so I will have to slot in an extra one. But it's kind of a positive cos then you're in more suspense. Question...am I making it obvious enough that Rachel is slipping away from people? Cos if I'm not I just told you that that is kinda the aim. Anyways enough from me, it's now over to you. Please review and also give suggestions. I want em! I use em!)


	6. The Revealing

_**THE REVEALING**_

_Pretty girl is suffering, _

_While he confesses everything._

_Pretty soon she'll figure out,_

_What his intentions were all about._

__

_Pretty Girl (The Way) _

_Sugarcult_

He lay awake that night unable to sleep. His mind wouldn't let him rest. It was full of worries, emotions, and regrets of the past few days in his life. Everything was turning around, becoming what he had always wished it wouldn't be, and it all came back to the girl who was lying next to him asleep.

She was the one he loved, the one girl in which he would die for. The one girl with the troubled past. The one girl who should have been the closest to him but now felt as though she was the furthest away.

He turned his head from his position on his back and looked over at her. She faced him, eyes closed, knees bent up slightly. Her head rested soundly on the pillow, which one of her hands was placed under. Her other arm lay peacefully against the mattress.

He saw her face, the one he had fallen for, the one he thought was the prettiest in all the land, looking completely content. All the worries were gone; no thoughts plagued her mind. This is how he wanted her to be forever.

But the person who lay next to him was a stranger for his girl was not like this. She had growing further away, her heart becoming weaker, and all because of reasons he was unsure of. Reasons that she couldn't express or inform him of.

He lifted his hand and traced his fingers along the bare arm, which lay against the sheets.

Her skin was still so smooth, still so princess-like. He didn't understand how under such beauty there could be someone as hard as she was. As self determined but at the same time as convinced that there was nothing for people like her.

His fingers moved up her arm and layed rest at her face. He absently brushed her silky smooth hair away and looked at her features as she slept.

He leaned over and kissed her gently on the forehead causing her to stir slightly but then fall back into her sleep.

He wanted to be holding her body to his. To be swept away in the feeling of losing himself in her. But he couldn't, not now, maybe not ever because she kept pulling away from him.

He didn't understand why. Maybe it was because that was all that she knew, her entire life had been about people letting her down. About clinging to the few people whom she knew she could truly trust.

What he wanted to know though was why she was slowly changing back to the way she used to be, before she came into his life. She had constantly shown the strength, which had developed after years of self-battles. The hardness of her soul. But once they had met she had slowly been able to suppress that side of her, rarely letting it be seen.

But now...

Seth turned himself away from Rachel, closed his eyes and let the much-needed sleep come.

* * *

"_You're scared." He murmured._

"_Why would I be scared?" She replied._

_He smiled slightly then seeing her innocence. "Because they're leaving you."_

_She stood before him, leaning into him as he pressed her body protectively against his. _

_It had been so long, so many ages passed since they had been together like this. Alone. Safe._

"_I don't understand why," she whispered._

"_You don't want to."_

_She looked up into his face. "How would you know that?"_

"_Because I know you."_

"_Not any more. You knew who I used to, I've changed."_

"_Have you?"_

_Rachel stopped short at the question. She looked up at Kurt who's eyes were focused strongly on hers an almost accusing look in his eyes._

_He leaned down and kissed her lightly on the lips whispering as he did._

"_You don't belong with them."_

* * *

Rachel shot awake sitting up and looking around expecting to see the young man before her again.

He had been her love before Seth, Ryan's best friend and part leader of the gang that they had developed over their time in Chino.

Seth stirred next to her and Rachel was brought back into reality.

"Are you alright?" he asked groggily.

Rachel nodded slightly even though she knew she wasn't. "Dream."

"You wanna..."

Rachel stood from the bed and left the room before Seth had the chance to finish his sentence.

* * *

Caleb walked in through the unlocked door without even knocking. He didn't believe he had too. He had given the Cohen's the house after all so he believed that he owned it.

"Ah, Sandy, just the person I wanted to see," he said walking into the kitchen.

Sandy looked up giving no indication that he was pleased with his guest.

"Is knocking just some new thing for the youngsters?"

Caleb looked at him coldly. "I don't have time for this. I am here on business."

Julie instantly appeared in the doorway with a pile of manilla folders in her arms. A sly smile was plastered on her face and Sandy knew that the two were up to no good.

"Make it quick," Sandy stated.

"It's not that simple," Caleb insisted. "Unless you consider matters with Rachel of that little importance."

Sandy stood from his seat and let the bagel he was holding fall onto the plate before him.

"What do you want?"

"We were her out of this town," Julie insisted.

"Sorry, can't help you."

Caleb calmly walked over to the table where Sandy was positioned and sat down.

"You forgot one important thing when you let the child come and live with you."

"And what's that?" Sandy asked sitting back down.

"You and Kikki are not her legal parents, and because she is only a minor the law says that she must live with her biological parents."

"The law says that she has free will."

"Not when she is at this age."

Julie moved over to join the men. "We have been doing some digging and it turns out that Rachel was taken from her home without her mothers consent. This technically means that she was kidnapped."

"Her mother wasn't in the picture. Her father is in jail. How can you honestly think that that doesn't give her enough reason to leave home?" Sandy asked strongly.

"We aren't trying to get you on the fact that you tore her out of her home, just that you have no grounds to keep her here. Remember, you are not in control of this child, as far as the law is concerned only her mother is, which means that she should be returned to her."

Rachel stood in the hallway, brought downstairs by the sounds of bickering. She listened closely to the conversation hearing the clear frustration in Sandy's voice as he spoke.

"Didn't you hear me? Her mother abandoned her and Ryan. They were left with only each other and all that Ryan did was fulfil his role as her 'guardian' and bring her into a safer environment."

Sandy paused instantly realising that they didn't care about the details, only about how they could use them legally to ensure that Rachel was taken from them and returned to Chino.

"You think you have the power to do this? Don't be so sure," Sandy growled.

"I am doing what is best for her," Caleb insisted.

"You couldn't care less about how this effects everyone else, the only thing you're worried about is yourself."

"We care about this town. She could cause it to become another one of those gang ridden areas," Julie spoke.

Sandy looked strongly at her. "You think that that will hold up in court?"

"So what are you going to do Sandy, keep her here until the Government comes after her? No one wants her here, not the kids, not the adults. She is a pest."

"I've been called a lot of things, but a pest...isn't that a little insensitive?" Rachel asked as she stepped into the doorway. "You think you can get rid of me that easily? With files and your fancy talk?"

"You forget your place Miss. Atwood," Caleb growled.

Rachel looked at the man, realising that in some way his words were correct. She had forgotten her place, she didn't know if it was here or back in Chino. If it was with her brother or in Seth's arms.

"Sticks and stones bastard."

"Watch who you mess with in this town," Julie said. 

"I'll mess with whoever the hell I want to."

Julie threw her a glare.

"Oh, if looks could kill." 

"If looks could kill I would have given you one a long time ago."

The couple didn't say goodbye, instead they moved to the door without another word leaving Sandy and Rachel in their wake.

"I won't let them do anything, I promise," Sandy said once they were gone but what he received was the retreating back of Rachel as she walked away not believing a word he was saying.

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Hey peeps. Hope you liked the chapter. Sorry I haven't been pasting as quickly but I'm back at school now so I haven't had all that much time. If that's annoying go scream at my teachers. LOL. Next chapter will see pretty much the big turn in the story, some of which involves Seth and Rachel's relationship, others which include the pretty much downhill ride Rachel is on right now. Please review.)


	7. The Love Torn

_**THE LOVE TORN**_

_How am I supposed to feel about the things I've done?_

_I don't know if I should stay or turn around and run_

_I know that I hurt you, things will never be the same_

_The only love I ever knew, I threw it all away._

_Breathing_

_Yellowcard_

Rachel watched the two as they joked and laughed near the lockers. She was well aware of Anna's lingering touch along Seth's arm, and even more aware of him not attempting to stop it.

"Hey Chino, how you doing?"

Rachel spun at the sound of the male voice behind her. Mark stood there watching Seth and his companion before looking down at her concerned.

"You two having troubles?"

Rachel looked up at him. "That obvious?" She asked sarcastically.

Mark half laughed. "Guess it was a pretty stupid thing to say."

Rachel shrugged not wanting to insult her friend but at the same time not caring if he took offence to the gesture.

"So I'll see you in class?" He asked.

"Sure thing."

Neither of them moved, they just stood there staring at each other as though lost in a completely different world.

Mark moved a little closer and Rachel looked away from him not wanting to lead him on in any way. She didn't have much of a choice though when he turned her face and captured her lips with his.

Rachel pulled away and pushed him off her.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" She demanded.

"Isn't that what you Chino people are like? You don't care about if you're in a relationship."

"I can't believe you, we're meant to be friends you son of a bitch."

"Come on, friends? We both know we want more."

Rachel stood up a little taller. "What I want is for you to get the hell away from me."

Mark walked away leaving Rachel yet again alone in the hallway of the large school. Seth and Anna had moved on now, and she was unaware of where they had gone. The only thing Rachel did know was that their relationship was becoming a serious issue.

She felt so unwanted lately. First with Seth and now with Caleb and Julie. No one seemed to want her around any more. She and Ryan hadn't spoken for days, not since the incident in the car.

What Mark had just done only made it worse. People believed she was something that she wasn't and that hurt her more than anything.

Rachel just wanted to crawl away and hide from the world.

* * *

Seth and Anna were playing with Seth's toy horse Captain Oats when Rachel walked into the room later that afternoon. She could see by the look on Anna's face that the girl knew she was winning the battle.

"Can we talk?" Rachel asked Seth.

He looked over at Anna who only smiled. "I'll just go." She stood and moved out of the room closing the door behind her.

"What's up?" Seth asked sitting on the end of his bed and looking expectantly at Rachel.

Rachel moved over and stood in front of him looking directly into his eyes.

"Mark kissed me today," she said.

Seth's face turned to anger. "He, what? God I'm gonna kill that kid."

"And it didn't feel wrong."

Seth stopped short at Rachel's words. He stared at her feeling his entire body go numb at her words.

"You wanted it?"

"No," she insisted. "It didn't feel wrong because it didn't feel like I was betraying anyone. And...it made me realise that I only felt like this because..."

Rachel stopped, she couldn't say it, couldn't even think it, and yet here she was, standing before her boyfriend telling him that kissing someone else didn't feel wrong because it didn't seem as though they were dating in the first place.

Seth stood slowly from his spot and walked over to her. "What are you saying?"

Rachel looked into his eyes. "I'm saying that whatever we had, doesn't feel like it's there any more."

She couldn't believe she was saying this. Part of her knew that the words she spoke were not true, that she loved Seth still with all her heart. But the other part of her, the confused and scared part told her that this was the only way. She had to cut off everything that represented happiness in her life because if she didn't, she would be hurt, like all the other times.

"Why don't you talk to Anna she might be able to give you some advice," Seth said.

"Are you completely stupid?" Rachel growled. "She's the whole reason why this is happening and you never even saw it. You've been so rapped up in her arms lately that you didn't even notice that we haven't been together for days."

Seth looked at her shocked. Her voice was so strong in his ears.

"When was the last time we were alone together? Or the last time that we kissed. Or the last time that you said 'I love you' to me?"

"Rach..."

"If this is how it's gonna be, I don't want to be a part of it."

Rachel's voice was soft now and Seth could tell that she was fighting to hold back the tears which threatened to escape her eyes.

"If I can't be with you," Seth began moving closer, so close that he could feel were warm breath against his face. "Then I don't know what I'm gonna do. I can't lose you again."

Rachel looked deep into his eyes and saw that her words were killing him inside.

"Who said you ever got me back? You promised me that nothing like what happened at Christmas would ever happen again."

"And it hasn't," Seth insisted. "Anna and I are friends, that's it."

"Then why does it feel like whenever she's around you get all goofy? You turn into the little boy with a crush."

"Rach, you've got this all wrong."

"No!" She yelled. "I've got this all right! You don't care any more Seth, you haven't for a while and I can see that, even when you're standing right here telling me that I'm wrong."

Seth couldn't believe what he was hearing. Rachel's words were so pained as she spoke, and he had no idea that she had been feeling this way.

He lifted his hand to her face and turned it to look directly at his.

"What do I have to do?"

Rachel didn't speak for a moment.

"Look me the eyes and say you love me. _Really_."

Seth didn't hesitate. "I love you. I love you Rach. God, I love you."

Rachel shook her head. "You don't mean that."

"I do."

"If you did then you wouldn't have to say it. I would know, like I used too."

Seth's eyes met her and she instantly saw the confusion, pain and regret they held. His hand left her face and his fingers entwined in her hair. Seth moved his face down to meet hers and kissed Rachel passionately feeling her return the gesture, knowing that she did truly want him.

Rachel wanted to fight him, she wanted to take control and say no, but she couldn't. This was what she wanted.

Seth moved her over to the bed and lay her down, never breaking their embrace. He felt her arms rap tightly around his neck as he rested his weight on his elbows, his body spanning the length of her.

His hands slowly travelling down her body and it was only when Rachel felt him begin to move her top up did she break away.

"No, I can't do this."

"What?"

"Seth get off me."

"Rach..."

Rachel moved out from under him and stood up beside the bed. "You think that this makes it alright? What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I..."

"You, what Seth?" Rachel was yelling now.

"I just thought this is what you wanted."

"What I want is for you to understand that I'm breaking up with you, not that I want to get lucky."

Seth was quiet now, he didn't know what to say. How could he have been so insensitive?

"This isn't going to work," Rachel said in a quiet voice. "Not now, not ever, and it's for real this time."

She walked out of the room leaving a stunned Seth behind. Rachel ran into the guest room and slammed the door behind her. She didn't know what to do, what to feel. She had just broken up with the love of her life over something as stupid as jealousy.

But had it been that? Or was it more to do with her? Was she changing the way that Kurt had said she was in her dream. Was she going to back the way she used to be.

Was she turning into stone?

* * *

Ryan knew something was wrong with Rachel, seriously wrong. He could see it in her eyes when he looked at her. She wasn't herself. Or rather she was, just her old self. The same girl that he knew back in Chino.

Even as she walked past him now he could no longer see the sparkle in her eye, the one she always had when she and Seth were together. He couldn't understand why she had broken up with him, he had been the best thing that had happened to her in a long while.

Rachel noticed Ryan staring at her as she walked passed and made a note of ignoring him as much as she could. Instead she pushed her way through the crowded hallway moving to her locker, preparing to go home after a long day at school.

When she arrived there she was greeted by the not so friendly smile of Anna.

"Finally realised you couldn't win?" She asked.

"Get out of my way Anna," Rachel growled.

"Or what, you'll break up with me?" She asked moving so that Rachel could get unlock the metal door and pull her bag out.

Rachel slammed the locker door closed and looked strongly at Anna. "You don't wanna know what I'll do to you."

Anna only laughed. "You know, it's probably a good thing you and Seth broke up."

"How do you figure?" Rachel asked not caring in the least.

"That way a _real_ woman can show him what it means to feel."

Her words hit Rachel hard and she had to force herself not to scream at her.

"And you think you're up for the job?"

"I don't think, I know."

Anna leaned in close to Rachel so that she was the only one who would hear the words, which escaped her lips in a whisper.

"I've already taken him for a spin more than once." Anna looked at Rachel. "While you were still together."

Rachel could feel herself beginning to shake, her entire body screaming for her to run, to not listen to what Anna was saying. To not believe it.

"He told me I was the best he'd ever had. Even better than the Chino trash he's so used to."

Anna barely finished the last word when Rachel punched her in the face, her emotions running high.

"Bitch!" Rachel screamed hitting her again.

Anna was knocked back onto the ground but that didn't stop Rachel's assault.

People began to gather around them seeing the commotion, which had erupted, in the hall.

Luke ran through the people taking a hold of Rachel's arms and pulling her trembling body off a now bloody Anna.

"Rach, what are you doing?" He asked but didn't get an answer because Rachel turned and ran from the hall.

She sprinted out into the front courtyard of the school her mind awhirl with what she had just done. She couldn't believe what Anna had said. Her mind wouldn't let her process it.

Rachel ran as fast as she could feeling the tears welling in her eyes and not holding them back.

Soon she could see the ocean ahead of her, the sand and the sun. Her feet hitting the sand, Rachel collapsed to her knees before the calm ocean water burying her head in her hands and crying.

No one walked the beach, no one swam in the ocean, it was completely empty, like her life. She felt completely alone. Everyone was against her, nothing was making any sense. She had lost the love of her life, she wasn't speaking to her brother and now the only friends she had were all leaving her side.

Tears rolled fast and heavy down her cheeks as weeks of bottled up emotions came spilling out.

Rachel felt like she was dying, part of her wanted to. If it meant that this could be over, that she wouldn't have to feel all this pain...

She sat back on the sand pulling her knees up to her chin, rapping her arms around her legs. She watched the waves as they crashed calmly against the shore.

Her right hand was bloody and as she looked at it she began to shake again. This couldn't be happening.

She stayed there for hours, until the sun began to drop below the horizon.

"Hey..."

The familiar voice came from behind her and Rachel didn't look up when Luke came and sat beside her watching the water.

"Hey..." she whispered.

"You wanna talk about what happened earlier?"

His voice was earnest; he seemed to be the only person at the moment that actually cared.

Rachel shook her head not looking at him.

"Rach," Luke began. "I'm the first one who'll stand up or you when things get rough, but the way you've been acting lately..."

Rachel turned her head to look at him and Luke instantly saw the tears, which had escaped her eyes.

"What?" She asked.

"It's like you're back in Chino."

She frowned at the comment and again looked away. "How the hell would you know?"

"Cos I can see when someone's trying to be tough, when their mind turns cold and they think that they have to be hard on the inside."

"Believe me, you haven't seen me hard on the inside."

"And if it's worse than this, I don't want too."

A silence swept over them while Rachel took in his words. Her way of being strong was to shut down, it was all that she knew. That meant to cut herself off from everyone, even those trying to help. Rachel knew that when she was like this she trusted no one.

But this was different, this wasn't about being strong, this was about being wanted.

Luke nudged her slightly. "Between you and me, that was a damn good hit. Your brother taught you well."

"Who said it was my brother?"

Luke looked at her and it only just occurred to him that Ryan wouldn't have been the only person she hung around with in Chino. There would have been others, just as tough as him.

"Well I just assumed..." He noticed that her eyes her downcast. "Are you feeling okay? You're not talking much."

"Cos when I do, no one listens."

"I'm listening."

"And I have nothing to say."

She was lying and Luke knew it. He could see all of the words, all of the pain which she had bottled up inside. Her eyes gave away her emotions, they always did.

"Okay..." he said, not wanting to push the matter. "How's Seth?"

"I wouldn't know."

"What? You mean you broke up?"

Rachel took a deep breath in but remained silent.

She then turned her head to face him.

"Don't you have practice?"

"Yeah, but it doesn't matter."

Rachel looked up to the sky. "Why are you doing this?" She asked almost accusingly.

She didn't want someone to tell her how to fix all her problems. She just wanted to be left alone.

"Because I'm your friend and I'm worried about you."

"Makes one of us."

Luke half smiled at her attempt to be strong. "You wanna go for a walk?"

Rachel looked over at him before shrugging.

They both rose from the sand and began to slowly move along the edge of the water.

"I love it out here," Luke said. "It's so quiet. Don't you feel like you're completely alone? Like there's nothing else in the world but you and the waves...?"

Rachel did feel this way, but even the waves weren't there for her. Everything was gone, nothing was left.

"When I was little I used to go to the beach all the time and make sandcastles, collect shells," he continued.

"People are stupid when it comes to the ocean," Rachel whispered.

"What?"

"They think it's beautiful and pure. They're always too nieve to see what's below the surface. Under all that peace there's something so deadly it would kill you in an instant. A completely different world."

She bent down and let the water run over her knuckles, cleaning them of all the blood and only leaving small splits in the flesh.

Luke looked over at her as she spoke, getting the feeling that she wasn't talking about the ocean any more. He could see the resemblance between her and the description. The beautiful, kind and caring girl on the outside, but on the inside was a past full of pain and disappointment.

"We're not talking about the ocean any more, are we?" He asked.

Rachel made no reply, instead she shivered against the chilled night breeze running her hands up and down her arms.

"Are you cold?" Luke asked stopping and turning to face her.

"A bit."

"Here."

He took off his thick jacket and moved closer so he could drape it around her shoulders. He made sure that her arms were fully covered and let his hands come to rest on her shoulders.

Rachel noticed that he was staring at her, his eyes boring into her soul.

"What?" She asked.

Luke answered her with a kiss, soft a sweet as his lips met hers.

Rachel tore away and took a few small steps back.

"What...?"

She couldn't speak, the shock of what he'd done played across her face.

"I wanted to show you how I feel," he insisted.

"Oh my God. I trusted you and all that 'I'm your worried friend' crap was bull."

"Rach..."

"Shut the hell up!" Rachel screamed she ripped the jacket off and threw it on the ground. "Take your jacket and enjoy your favourite place. _Alone_."

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Hey all! Hope you likes this chapter. It was a bit longer than usual just because I couldn't write everything I wanted in a small chapter. I have too much to say! Please review.)


	8. The Pain Inflicted

_**THE PAIN INFLICTED**_

_I doubt that I will ever find out _

_If there's a way to get out of feeling alone_

_Cause lately I've been thinking maybe_

_That no ones going to save me_

__

_Never There_

_Hoobastank_

Sandy heard the front door close quietly, followed by soft footsteps walking down the hallway.

"Where have you been? I've been worried sick."

The greeting Rachel received was one that she had expected. Of course Sandy would be mad at her, but somehow she just didn't care. Not after what had happened with Luke.

"Out," was all that she said in reply moving to walk past him.

"Oh no, stop right there. We're gonna have a talk."

Rachel didn't cease her movement. "I'm going to bed."

"Rachel Atwood don't you dare take another step!"

Rachel stopped in her tracks letting out a sigh before turning to face Sandy.

"Sit."

She sat down in the chair he pointed to and folded her arms. Sandy stood in front of her.

"Now you're going to explain to me why you were out alone until 11:30pm and didn't even call, especially after what happened with you and Anna today at school."

Rachel looked up casually and met his eyes. "I wasn't alone."

"I don't care, you live in this house and you will follow our rules, one of which is always tell us where you're going and who you're with."

Rachel counted off the words on her fingers as she said them. "Beach. Luke."

"And what were you doing with Luke on the beach?" Sandy asked.

"That's none of your business,"

"It damn well is my business girl!"

"You wanna know?" Rachel asked standing from her chair, her voice entering the yelling range. "I'll tell you. We were talking, something no one seems to have time for any more. We walked for a while and then – once I was lulled into a false sense of security – he kissed me, proving that all guys are complete ass holes who are just looking for the quickest way into your pants."

Sandy stood silently then not knowing what to say in reply.

"Happy?" Rachel asked sarcastically.

"Rachel...I..."

"I'm going to bed," Rachel stated turning and walking away from him.

She headed for the guest bedroom where she had managed to move all her belongings into not long after the end of her relationship with Seth. As she entered the room she saw Ryan sitting on the edge of the bed staring at floor.

"Just what I need," she mumbled causing Ryan to look up.

"I was worried," he said.

"You shouldn't have been," Rachel replied.

"Well I'm sorry for freaking out after my sister knocks a girl out and then runs away without telling anyone where she's going." His voice was filled with sarcasm.

Ryan looked at her strongly wanting to know as much as possible.

"No lies, no stories, tell me what's _really_ going on."

Rachel didn't even flinch.

"Get out Ryan," Rachel said plainly.

* * *

It was 2am and Rachel sat alone in the darkness of the backyard watching the ocean in the distance as the waves crashed upon the shore.

She felt like she was dying as the memories of the past few weeks came flooding back.

No one seemed to care any more and when they tried to they ended up attacking her. Everyone just wanted her gone. Caleb had told her that she was insignificant, that he would do anything in his power to make sure she was sent back to where she came from.

She almost didn't care. Was it really that bad leaving New Port? It's not like there was anything for her here anyway.

Everything was falling apart around her.

Ryan was never there any more and even when he was she felt like she couldn't open up to him. She couldn't let go like she used to. Nothing was the same between them.

Now Seth was gone...

He had been her final strength, the one thing that had kept her going and she had cut him off from her life out of fear of being hurt. She loved him more than life itself, had given him everything but somehow it just didn't feel right any more.

A single tear escaped Rachel's eye causing her vision to blur for a moment before it fell.

She wanted things to go back to the way they were, before any of this had started. And yet when she was given the opportunity to do so, she couldn't bring herself to change it.

Rachel felt so alone.

Night-time was the worst, when the house was still and the moon shone through the cracks in the curtains. She no longer had Seth with her on the bed, nor Ryan. She lay there, silently aware that there was no one with her. There were no arms around her waist, no warm breath against her neck. No kiss goodnight.

The bed was empty.

The bed was cold.

She was alone.

* * *

Rachel stood in the kitchen hands clasped tightly on the bench top as she fought to hold back the sounds of her weeping, she didn't want anyone to hear her. Didn't want to show a weakness but at the same time she wanted to scream out.

In front of her lay a small kitchen knife, resting between her hands. She stared at it, her entire body shaking.

She rolled up her long sleaves and slowly moved her right hand to the hilt of the knife bringing the blade to her left wrist...

* * *

Seth was awoken by the creaking of his door opening. He looked up sleepily to see Rachel standing there.

"Rach...? What?"

He didn't have a chance to finish his sentence as Rachel moved into the room and kissed him hard, entwining her fingers in his hair.

"Rach, are you okay?" Seth asked.

Rachel smiled. "I'm fine."

Seth looked strongly at her. "I thought you didn't want this."

"Can't a girl change her mind?" She asked kissing him again this time pushing him back into the sheets as she did.

"Yeah, but this isn't you."

Rachel looked down at Seth frowning. "You know it's me Seth. It's the same face you love."

She kissed him sweetly.

"Same mouth you kissed."

Her kiss began to move to his jawbone.

"Same body you..."

She kissed his neck.

"Well let's not go into detail."

Seth pushed her away gently and Rachel sat up next to him. "As much as I'm turning into a woman as I say this; it wouldn't be right."

Rachel looked down at him and paused before she spoke. "It's Anna, isn't it?"

"No," Seth insisted sitting up. "It's because you haven't been yourself lately and this is not the Rachel I fell in love with."

She stared at him, not saying anything, only looking into his eyes. Her mind was blank. How could this be happening? She thought this was what he wanted, what they both wanted.

"Fine," Rachel finally said turning to leave. "If you don't want me..."

"Wait..."

Seth grabbed her arm and in the process the sleave which covered it was pushed up revealing the long, thin cuts she had made across her wrist.

Seth stared at them in shock, his heart sank, his mind wouldn't register anything.

Rachel tugged her arm away.

"I'm going."

She moved off the bed and began to walk to the door. Seth was quick to follow. He grabbed onto her arm again and pulled the sleave up yet again revealing her self-mutilation.

"Don't touch me!" Rachel screamed pulling away.

"What did you do?" Seth asked even though he knew full well what.

"I'm nothing, right? Not my mind, not my body." When Rachel spoke her voice was strong and strained.

Seth was on the verge of tears from seeing the love of his life being put through so much pain.

"So now," Rachel continued. "They're both being destroyed and everyone's happy."

"Cutting yourself won't make people happy, if anything it's letting them win!"

Rachel looked into Seth's eyes and he felt his knees go weak as she spoke the words.

"It doesn't make them sad."

"Rach..." he began. "Talk to me. _Please._"

Rachel stared at him, her face blank for a moment. "There's nothing to say. But if you tell _anyone_, I swear to God..."

She left the threat unfinished and turned back toward the door.

"Rachel," Seth said desperately. "I love you."

Rachel stopped only for a moment. "Then you're a fool."

And with that, she left.

"I can't believe she was suspended," Kirsten said frustrated. "What is going through Rachel's mind?"

She paced her office as Caleb watched amused.

"I hate to say it Kikki but I told you so. That girl is nothing but trouble."

"No dad, she has been nothing but trouble ever since _you_ came into her life." Kirsten whirled on her father.

Caleb, however, remained calm. "I have done nothing but simply show everyone the facts. No one believed me, but now I have my proof."

"Don't act like nothing is going on with you and Julie, you have this whole thing figured out. How you're going to get Rachel taken away from us."

"This incident should show you that I have good reason for doing that."

"What it shows is that you're pushing her over the edge. None of this started until you told her and Sandy that you were going to make sure she was taken back to Chino."

"Are you disagreeing with me?"

"I damn well am!" Kirsten yelled. "You have no idea what that girl had to go through while she was over there. She only just _started_ getting over it when you decided to drop your bombshell."

Caleb only stared at his daughter. "Kikki, what I am doing is best for your family."

"No!" Kirsten strode past her father walking toward the door. "What is best for my family is for you to stay the hell away from us."

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Hey. Sorry this chapter was a little depressing but I had to show just how bad things were getting for Rachel. Hope you enjoyed. Please review.)


	9. The Leaving

**_THE LEAVING_**

_I think I'm breaking out_

_I'm going to leave you now_

_There's nothing for me here_

_It's all the same_

_Way Away_

_Yellowcard_

That morning Seth awoke with a start. Had the previous night been a dream or had Rachel really come into his room? Had he really seen the cuts along her arm?

Seth kicked the blanket off and ran downstairs quickly only to see Kirsten and Sandy moving about the house busily getting ready for their day at work. Rachel sat alone in the lounge reading the newspaper. Seth took note of what she was wearing; a long sleave top with a wide leather bracelet covering her left wrist.

_It was real,_ he thought.

Seth moved in and sat next to her causing Rachel to scoot over slightly putting more distance between them.

"What are you reading?" He asked.

"What does it look like?" Rachel answered.

Seth knew that the question had been an obvious one, possibly even stupid but he needed to start to conversation somewhere.

"Rach...we have to talk."

"There's nothing to say."

Seth almost laughed. "Nothing to say? What planet are you on?"

He noticed how she hadn't looked up at him once.

"It scares me that you think that little of yourself..."

Rachel eyes flicked away from the words on the page before her momentarily telling Seth that she knew exactly what he was talking about. And that he was getting through.

"You know I love you, no matter what, but this is getting out of hand. First us breaking up, then Anna." Seth's voice became a whisper. "Now you're cutting yourself."

A silence swept over both of them for a time, where neither spoke, moved. This was something they used to do all the time, only it was attached to something positive. Both of them just enjoying each other's company.

Seth moved his hand to her chin and turned her head slightly to look at him.

Rachel pulled away from his touch and just stared at him not saying a word.

"Let me help you," Seth insisted.

Rachel blinked at the words. "I don't need you."

Seth nodded slightly knowing that she would put up a fight no matter what, he wouldn't win that easily. He moved closer to her so their bodies touched slightly and he could look at her closely.

"Don't lose yourself in something which isn't worth getting caught up in."

Rachel turned her eyes to his and searched Seth's honest face for a moment. He seemed to be completely transfixed by her. His eyes set on hers.

Seth moved in closer and kissed Rachel softly aware that she wasn't returning the gesture but at the same time not caring. He had to prove to her he would be there, no matter what.

He then felt her give in slightly, answering his kiss with her own. Seth moved his hand to the side of her face but the moment that it touched her flesh Rachel realised what she was doing and tore away.

She stood from the couch and looked around as if only noticing where she was. Her eyes travelled everywhere and only came to rest on Seth when he spoke.

"Rach, you can't tell me you didn't feel that."

She frowned slightly at the comment before turning quickly and leaving Seth alone on the sofa.

That day at Harbor the talk was all about the incident between Anna and Rachel, each person with their own version of the story to tell.

"I heard they were making a drug deal and something went wrong. It wouldn't surprise me, Rachel being from Chino and all."

"I saw the whole thing, Anna hit her first."

"Did you hear about the fight the other day out in the courtyard?"

Ryan couldn't stand it any more, he had to get away from the crowd, away from the voices, away from the proof that what his sister had done was real.

He moved into the library and sat alone in the corner trying to concentrate on the overdue homework, which was in front of him. But his mind continued to wonder. His ears kept picking up conversations.

Ryan didn't understand what was happening to his sister lately. She had changed so much over the past few months that he felt as though she were a complete stranger to him now.

She had gone backward, not only to before she had moved to New Port and changed her life but before Chino. Was that even possible? Or was this just another side of her which had rarely been shown.

Sure she had had her days when they were younger, they both had. Times when the only thing, which would keep them alive, was turning to stone on the inside. Being tough. But Ryan had never seen it last as long as this.

He didn't even understand where it was coming from. The only thing he could think of was Caleb and Julie, but even that wouldn't have been enough to make her snap.

Ryan threw down his pen and slammed the textbook shut in frustration and confusion. He had to find out what was going on before it was too late.

Rachel picked up the phone after it had rung at least four times hoping that the person would have hung up.

"Hello?" She said.

"Rach, it's me."

Rachel let out a sigh. "What do you want Ry'?"

"We have to talk," Ryan insisted.

His voice was slightly distorted as though his phone was getting bad reception.

"Now?"

"Yes, now."

Rachel stood silently waiting for him to continue, she sure as hell wasn't going to. She wasn't in the mood to talk, especially not to her older, overly protective brother.

"Seth told me what you did," Ryan stated.

"Jimmy, I didn't expect you to see you here," Sandy exclaimed moving to shake his friends hand.

"Yeah, well I thought I might stop by, ask you how Rachel's doing," Jimmy replied sitting down in the guest chair at Sandy's desk.

Sandy let out a sarcastic laugh. "Suspended."

Jimmy's eyes went wide. "For what? She was acting in a defence."

"Not as far as the school concerned. I understand where they're coming from, she had no right to snap like that, especially on school grounds."

There was a silence between the two.

"So why are you so curious?" Sandy asked. "I thought Marissa would have given you the update."

"She doesn't know much, apparently Ryan isn't letting on."

Sandy nodded his head. He had noticed that Ryan had seemed to stepped out of the spotlight lately, choosing to keep to himself more than usual. He knew that it had something to do with the fact that his sister was on a downhill slide.

"She's a good kid," Jimmy insisted.

"I know that."

"I just wanted to make sure she was alright."

Sandy looked at him. "You have taken a shining to her."

"What can I say? She gave me advice, which I used, and which has worked. Gotta owe her something."

Rachel froze, she stopped breathing, her eyes went wide. How could Seth have told Ryan? He was the last person Rachel wanted to know.

"W-what?" She asked cautiously.

"I said 'sorry I can't make it to the gig'."

Rachel let out a sigh of relief. "What are talking about?"

"I wasn't talking to you," Ryan explained and it was then that Rachel heard the people in the background.

"Oh."

There was a pause and Rachel knew that she had let on too much.

"Are you okay?" Ryan asked.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"I dunno, you just seemed a bit worried for a second."

He received no reply and only nodded his head slightly, knowing that he wasn't going to get anything out of her at the moment.

"So I'll see you after school?"

Rachel hung up the phone the moment he had finished his sentence. She looked at the phone in her hand for a moment. She wanted to be at school now, as much as she hated the actual going to class part, she missed the people. At the same time though, she was happy to be by herself, away from the prying eyes of those who are too curious.

Kirsten had told her that Julie had been around again, with more evidence to back up her and Caleb's case. Right now, Rachel honestly didn't care what happened to her. Didn't care that people were treating her like some toy that you could just throw around. It was becoming monotonous.

Her mind travelled back to the kiss between her and Seth earlier that day, the way he had thought that everything would become better if he could please her physically.

That had nothing to do with it. Her body was fine. It was her mind, which ached. Her mind, which knew how many people, loathed her. Her mind which wanted her to end it all.

Rachel undid the leather band, which she had around her left wrist revealing the deep wounds in her flesh below. Somehow, though she had damaged the skin, left scars, it had not been painful. She almost welcomed the feeling, it wasn't one of hate.

Her bottom lip began to tremble slightly as all the same emotions, which had plagued her the previous night, came flooding back. Feelings of hatred, feelings of sadness. But most of all, the one thing which hurt her the most...

Feelings on being alone.

Everything had gone wrong, turning upside down in a whirlwind of malevolence and distrust. Rachel could feel her chest begin to hurt, felt her mind begin to wonder, trying to find a sense in all the commotion.

She wanted it to end. For everything to stop. For there to be no more pain, or confusion.

Rachel stood from her seat looking at the clock. It was 3:30pm, and she knew that Ryan and Seth would now be on their way home from school, coming back to check on her. To ask her questions. She didn't want that, couldn't think of having to sit through their talks again.

Rachel looked down at the phone she still held before dialling Sandy's work.

After a few rings he answered.

"Hello?"

"Sandy, it's Rachel."

"Rachel?" Sandy answered in a surprised tone. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," she lied. "I was just calling to let you know I'm going out to a friends house for tonight and tomorrow."

"Really?" Sandy sounded a little shocked. "Where does this friend live?"

"Just down the road, it's no big deal."

"Uh-huh..."

For some reason Sandy thought he could detect something unusual in her voice, the way her words formed almost made her sound...

Happy...

"What time do you want me to pick you up?"

"Um...tomorrow night, after work."

Sandy thought about that for a moment. "And you're okay getting there by yourself."

"Yeah."

"Okay, have fun, I'll call to let the boys know you won't be home when they get back from school."

"Thanks."

She hung up quickly dropping the phone on the sofa and running upstairs to her room. Rachel took a quick look around before pulling her backpack out from under her bed and flipping it open.

She then moved around to the closet and drawers, rifling through her belongings and only choosing those she thought she would need, stuffing them into the bag. She forced the zip closed and took one last look at the room before running out again. She wanted to leave before Seth and Ryan arrived.

Remembering what Kirsten had said about Caleb working at his beachside homes today Rachel began to run toward the ocean, being grateful that a life in Chino had made her so fit.

Legs pumping under her she felt the wind flowing through her untied hair, whipping it back as she travelled.

When she finally reached the house Rachel stopped dead and took in a breath, knowing that what she was about to do would change her life forever. But it would also make all of what she was going through now stop. Finally she would be free.

Knocking loudly on the door she waited until Caleb answered before pushing her way past him into the house.

"Nice place you got here, how the rent?" She asked sarcastically as she whirled on a shocked Caleb, one eyebrow raised.

"What do you want?" He asked clearly not caring.

"A favour."

"And what makes you think I will do you a favour?" Caleb looked strongly at her, challengingly.

Rachel crossed her arms, not letting her guard down. "Cos it's a win-win situation, _Caleb_."

When she said his name, her voice was filled with disgust and hatred.

"As much as I would _love_ to do anything for you I have to say that the only things I would win with are those which cause you great pain."

"So what are you going to do, _talk_ me to death?"

Caleb snarled at the comment.

"Now, do I have to scream at you or will you sit down, shut up and hear me out?" Rachel's voice was filled with a strength that Caleb had never heard before.

He watched her for a moment before sitting slowly in the chair behind him, never letting his eyes leave her face.

"What do you want?" He asked.

Rachel's voice never wavered as she spoke the words, her eyes never left his.

"I want out."

Caleb's eyes went wide in shock. "I'm sorry?"

"You heard me you moron, I want out. I want to leave. I want to go back to the place I came from. I want to go back to the way things were before."

A slight smile began to creep along Caleb's face and he didn't hold it back. "What did Kikki say about this?"

"You think I'm that stupid?"

"Was that rhetorical?"

"She doesn't know Jackass!" Rachel screamed. "_No one_ knows."

Caleb flashed a look of disappointment her way. "Which means that it won't be long before they come looking for you, now, does it?"

"Not until tomorrow night."

"What was that?"

"I'm at a friends house," Rachel stated blankly.

"I see..."

Rachel stalked up to him. "So..." she said. "You're gonna take me back, I don't care how, and I don't care who does it, just as long as it's _now_."

Caleb took one last look at her before rising slowly. He couldn't believe how overly happy he was. She was finally leaving, moving out of his life, out of his town.

Rachel could see the look of glee on Caleb's face and shuddered internally at the thought that she was making him happy. That wasn't her aim at all. Neither was making herself happy. In all honestly what she was doing wasn't making her feel any better. She hated the thought of leaving her new town, her new life, to return to her old one. But she felt as though she had no choice. It's not like anyone would miss her. Everyone wanted her gone anyway. Wasn't she doing everyone a favour?

She watched Caleb on his cell-phone as the thoughts invaded her mind. He was talking frantically to his personal driver, telling him to come back from the beach and take someone on a special drive.

Almost instantly there was a knock at the door and Caleb looked at Rachel who was moving to answer it.

"This is a one way ticket girl, there's no coming back," he said.

Rachel didn't say anything in return, instead, she looked at him, one last time before walking out the door, stepping into the waiting car and leaving New Port behind.

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Mwahahah. I love ending chapters with a cliffy. Ain't it funny? So pretty much I suppose you guys know where the next chapter is going. It will be based both in Chino and New Port. Please Review.

OMG IS IT JUST ME OR HAS WHOEVER THE HELL WROTE 'CHELSEA ATWOOD' TOTALLY STOLEN MY IDEA? PEOPLE ARE EVEN SENDING IN REVIEWS TELLING THEM TO WRITE IN THE EXACT SAME STORY LINES, WHICH I HAVE, RUNNING NOW. ARGH!!!

Oh quick question...what's up with everyone wanting Rachel and Seth to sleep together? Haven't I made it obvious enough that they already have? In 'The Curse' it says they were amazed at how they weren't losing control like usual. In 'The Impression' when Ryan and Rachel have _the talk_ she says that Seth is the right guy for her to sleep with. In 'The Sever' Seth is thinking about how he wants to be losing himself in her like he used to. And the clearest of them all in 'The Pain Inflicted' Rachel cuts herself off when she says 'the same body you...well let's not go into detail'. If that don't scream out, they've had sex I dunno what does. So help me out a little here, is it not obvious enough, or have most of you picked up on it?)


	10. The Reunion

**_THE REUNION_**

_Today I changed _

_New town with the same old face_

_One way to shake this place_

_That I can't escape_

__

_Stuck in America _

_Sugarcult_

'_Hey boys, just letting you know that Rachel's gone out to a friends. Kirsten is buying dinner tonight so don't worry about making anything. I'll see you later."_

"That's it?" Ryan asked.

Seth was staring blankly at the answering machine. "Unless it decides to give us an encrypted code with more message, I'm guessing, yes."

Ryan nodded his head slightly feeling a sense of relief now that he knew where his sister was. Coming home to an empty house after everything that had been happening wasn't something that he needed right now.

"So..." Seth began.

"So...?" Ryan asked.

"Is it just me or is Rachel different somehow?" Seth thought about his question. "Okay, that was the most obvious question I think anyone could have asked."

"Got that right."

Seth opened up the fridge and pulled out some juice. "You want any?" he asked

"Nuh, I'm good."

Ryan watched Seth's face as he poured himself a glass, it seemed as though he was having an internal fight with himself, contemplating wether or not he should do something.

_I can't tell him, she told me not too,_ a voice said to Seth.

He's her brother, he has the right to know, said another. 

_If she finds out she'll kill you._

_It's not like you have a choice._

Seth turned to talk to Ryan and his arm swept over the bench knocking the open juice carton off and spilling the contents all over the floor.

"Dammit," he whispered.

"Something wrong?" Ryan asked.

Seth disappeared behind the counter and re-emerged only a moment later, wet paper towels' in hand.

He placed his hands on the top of the counter and took in a deep breath before looking directly at Ryan.

"Rachel..."

Ryan stared at him expectantly. "What?"

"She cut herself."

Seth instantly saw Ryan's face drop as his words hit home. He couldn't know how he was feeling, even though Seth himself loved Rachel with all his heart, to know what it was like to have such news broken to you, as a brother was something Seth hoped he would never know.

Ryan couldn't speak, no words were forming as his mind completely stopped. He was trying to convince himself that Seth was lying, that this was all just some joke. How could his baby sister be cutting herself? It just wasn't possible.

"She came to my room a couple of nights ago," Seth began, cautious as to how he worded his explanation. "I saw it by accident."

Ryan looked strongly at him. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Well for starters, she pretty much threatened to kill me if I did, and you don't wanna mess with that girl when she's mad."

"Seth!" Ryan screamed, his voice was full of emotion. "Do you have _any_ idea how serious this is?"

Seth looked back at Ryan with an honest face. "Of course I do, that's why I am telling you. She needs help Ryan. This is getting way beyond what we thought it would be."

Ryan wasn't hearing his words any more, he was just staring into space, mind blank of thought.

* * *

"Wake up, we're here."

The voice sounded from the distance, but as Rachel slowly opened her eyes to the twilight sun she became aware that it was coming from right next to her.

"Hey, lady, are you listening?"

Her eyes slowly came into focus, before a gut wrenching, tidal wave of memories flooded into her mind. Looking around to see the mobile homes, some barely standing, her entire childhood flashed before her eyes.

_Drunken mother...._

_Broken promises...._

_Two protective brothers...._

_Lost friendships...._

_Lost love...._

Rachel slowly unbuckled her seatbelt feeling as though she were in a dream world. Nothing seemed real; nothing registered properly in her mind.

She took a tight hold on her bag and only then realised that the driver was leaning over her, taking a hold of the doorhandle and throwing the door open.

"Caleb said to drop you off and go."

Rachel nodded absently before climbing out of the car. She smelt the familiar smell of times gone by. Saw the familiar houses lined along the street.

It was only when the driver slammed the door and took off down the road leaving her alone on the street did she realise what was happening.

She was back.

"Home sweet home."

* * *

As the night slowly fell Ryan sat alone in the pool house, his mind awhirl with emotions and realisations. Rachel was falling apart; nothing about her screamed his sister any more. He felt that it was entirely his fault. Lately he just hadn't been the brother he used to be, they never talked, never shared stories, emotions.

Somehow Ryan believed that through their previous connection they had been each other's strengths. Used one another as a shoulder hold onto, to lean on, to cry on.

It wasn't the same any more. Everything was changing, and none of it for the better.

Ryan looked out the windows and into the backyard wondering at that moment; just what Rachel was going through.

* * *

He smirked at the sight, a young girl, walking alone through the mean streets of his town, oblivious to the dangers, which lurked around every corner.

"Hey good looking!" He yelled out causing his companion to raise an eyebrow in anticipation. "You charge by the hour?"

She suddenly stopped in her tracks at the comment and he quickened his pace, easily closing in the distance between them.

"You, know a girl like you could get in a lot of trouble in a place like this."

He suddenly pounced, charging at the girl and intending to take a hold of her. But to his surprise she sidestepped the attack and spun around with every intention on punching him square in the face.

He stopped short when his eyes fell on her face. A familiar one.

"Rachel?"

Rachel's fist stopped mere inches from her friend's face. "Mitch?"

"Well, look at you. I thought you knew better than that. Street's ain't safe."

Rachel was dumbfounded. What were the odds of running into someone from Ryan's old gang so soon?

"You know me, never been one to follow the rules."

Mitch laughed at the comment only then becoming aware that his fellow stalker was positioned behind Rachel. Mitch instantly went to stop him, but was too slow and soon Rondell had one arm rapped around her waist, the other blocking the instinctive strike, which came at his face.

"Wow, girl, hold up, it's me," he said.

Rachel froze letting her hand fall to her side but not before giving Rondell and decent wack in the stomach.

"What the hell are you trying to do, get yourself killed?" She asked accusingly.

"Only by the best," he replied.

Rachel rolled her eyes at the comment but at the same time she felt relieved to have familiar faces around her again.

Rondell took the bag she had slung over he shoulder and swung it slightly as the trio began to walk to the gangs meeting place.

"So how's my dog Ryan these days?" Mitch asked.

Rachel shrugged knowing that her brother would come up in the conversation eventually but at the same time hoping to bypass any small talk on him.

"He's cool," she replied bluntly.

"You know it's been too long girl, we missed you runnin' with the boys." Rondell was smiling as he spoke.

Rachel looked over at him, their eyes meeting for the briefest of moments. "I missed it too."

When they finally arrived at the run-down mobile home each of them breathed in the smell of cigarettes and alcohol. Rachel then realised that they were the only people in the three bedroom home.

"So what's been going down? Looks like everyone jumped ship," she commented taking to the sofa.

Mitch sat across from her opening up a fresh bottle of beer and taking a swig. "Out doin' some re-con," he said as Rondell sat beside Rachel. "Had a confrontation with Theoty's gang. Remember him?"

"Yeah, A.J's men, right?" Rachel asked shivering slightly at the thought of her mother's boyfriend.

"You got it. They said more would come tomorrow night."

Rachel frowned slightly. "Tomorrow night?"

"Down the road, past your old street," Rondell stated.

"What for?" Rachel asked. "These guys still do the revenge thing?"

Rondell smirked at the comment. "Mitch here went for a tumble with Theoty's sister."

"Since when does anyone cared about that?" Rachel asked sarcastically.

Mitch smiled at her. "No one cared with you because you're such a sweet find. Let's just say you know what you're doing."

Rachel cocked her head to one side. "And she doesn't?"

"She's already got a bit of flesh on the side who don't like Mitch moving in on his territory if you get what I'm saying."

Rachel let on a small that-explains-it nod.

"You know," Mitch said leaning forward on his elbows to look directly into Rachel's face. "Kurt missed you."

"I bet he did," Rachel replied absently.

"Said he hasn't found one as good as you since you and Ryan skipped town."

"Be still my heart," Rachel commented bluntly.

Rondell gave her slight nudge. "So, you two gonna hook up again?"

An image of Seth flashed across Rachel's mind and she was instantly filled with thoughts of him. The way he kissed her. The way she seemed to fit perfectly into his arms.

* * *

Later that night as Rachel slept she felt the bed she was in shift slightly then two strong arms encircle her waist.

"Hey Babe," came a familiar male voice from behind her.

Rachel didn't flinch; instead, she moved further back, pressing her body deeper into the new arrivals, feeling his breath against her neck.

"I missed you," she whispered sleepily.

A small laugh sounded. "Don't blame you."

Rachel voiced a small tired moan and turned her head slightly seeing Kurt lying beside her. She felt him kiss her neck lightly before she shifted her body and faced him fully.

A mischievous smile was evident on his face, even though the room was dark.

Rachel could just make out his attire, fully white. An Everlast singlet donned his torso, exposing his well-shaped arms. Champion sweat pants sat loosely on his waist. His face hadn't changed, it was still so beautiful. Dark brown eyes, which Rachel's always seemed to get lost in and dark brown hair to match, which thanks to the gel used to spike it almost seemed black.

It was no surprise that this young man, two years her senior and one of Ryan's past best friends was such a popular one amongst the ladies.

However, despite what others might say he had only ever had eyes for the girl whom was lying next to him now, in the house which he called his home.

Kurt noticed how Rachel seemed to be staring at him and raised an eyebrow.

"What?" She whispered.

He looked at her for a moment before pulling her close against him never letting his arms leave her waist.

"I forgot how innocent you look when you sleep," he murmured.

"Innocent?"

Kurt smirked. "If that's possible."

He pulled her closer to him so their bodies touched and their lips brushed against each other.

Rachel remembered the first time this had happened; it seemed so long ago now, almost a lifetime. They had been together for the first time – her first time – in the very bed they were in now. She couldn't help but feel her body stiffen slightly at the thought. For her, right here, right now, was not a good time.

She could feel Kurt smiling against her mouth even though he barely touched her, he was thinking the exact same thing and she knew it.

"Kurt..." she began but was cut off by his lips pressed against hers.

A jolt went through Rachel's body; they hadn't been together in so long. One of his hands moved to the small of her back, the other to the side of her face as the kiss deepened.

As he moved his lips down her neck and along her collarbone he rolled himself on top of her. Rachel could feel his hands travelling down her sides and coming to rest on her hips as his pinned her beneath him.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered meeting her lips again, feeling her fingers snake their way into his hair.

Kurt broke their contact for a moment allowing Rachel to catch her breath and he smiled down at her. He pictured the last time they had been together, the night before Ryan took her away from him. He had never felt so alive.

"Do you remember the first time?" He asked.

Rachel nodded her head not having a chance to speak because Kurt's lips were on hers again, taking away her breath. His hands moved from her hips and began to slowly push her top up exposing her flesh.

Rachel knew that if had not been dark, Kurt would have instantly wanted to know about the scars, which were evident there, along with her tattoos'.

Her hands pressed against his muscular chest and moved to rid him of his shirt before stopping short.

Rachel's eyes flew open and she instantly pulled away.

"I can't do this," she said.

Kurt frowned at her. "Why not Babe? You know you want to." He moved in again but this only caused Rachel to wriggle out from under him.

"I don't..." Rachel paused mid-sentence. "I – I can't."

Kurt looked at her for a moment before moving closer. "What's wrong?"

Rachel shook her head even though she was well aware that Kurt could tell she was lying.

"Nothing."

Slowly he nodded his head. "Get some sleep," he whispered.

Rachel lay back down, her back facing him and tried her hardest to again return to the realm of dreams.

She felt Kurt's arm rap warmly around her, his fingers entwining with hers as he did. A light kiss was placed on the side of her neck, followed by another one further down on her shoulder.

"Night Babe," Kurt whispered resting his head against hers.

Rachel didn't reply because she wasn't thinking about the young man lying beside her, she was thinking about another young man who should be there instead.

* * *

Seth awoke with a start to the sound of the phone ringing. Turning to his bedside table he reached out a little too far and soon found himself tumbling off the bed and onto the floor with a loud _thump_.

"Ow..." he whined rubbing his back slightly before half-heartedly picking up the phone and climbing back into bed.

"Hello?" he murmured.

An eerie silence filled the receiver but Seth thought he could just make out the sounds of someone breathing lightly on the other line.

"Hello?" He said again.

Seth groaned loudly thinking about all of the possible things he would do to the person who not only woke him up, but caused him to injure himself in the stupidest of ways.

"Look, if you don't say something soon, I'm hanging up and going back to sleep."

Still the phone remained silent.

He pulled the phone away from his ear and looked at it for a moment before fumblingly slamming it back down on the cradle. Turning his back on it as though it had betrayed him, Seth rolled over onto his side and closed his eyes.

Little did he know that if he had only waited one more moment he would have heard the young girls voice on the other end.

"Seth..."

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Hello my gentle readers, sorry it had taken a little longer to get this chapter posted but I was kinda going through the whole 'writers block'.

Next chapter is focused a lot in Chino though don't worry there is still stuff in New Port. Obviously the Cohen's realise what's actually going on. There will also be a confrontation between Rachel and her mother Dawn and a scene I thought I had to put in, Rachel seeing Trey in jail. Don't worry the whole Seth/Rachel thing will be sorted out eventually.

Just to give you a little bit of a scare also...not all goes well in the fight between Ryan's old gang and Theoty's when one of your favourite characters gets caught in the line of fire – and no, it's not Rachel. Please review!!)


	11. The Old Home

**THE OLD HOME**

_Do you know_

_The story from the start?_

_Do you know me_

_Like you always told me?_

_Honest Questions_

_Daniel Bedingfield_

Marissa sat with Ryan, neither saying anything, they just sat there. Together. It had been a long time since they had seen each other like this, where no words were spoken, no gestures exchanged. They would just sit before the ocean watching the sun rise as though there weren't a care in the world.

Yet Marissa knew all too well that Ryan's mind was not clear of thought, nor was it close to finding reason amongst the twister of emotions and revelations. She could see it in his face, in his eyes. He was scared.

He had told her of what Seth had informed him, that his sister was indeed losing control, that she was at breaking point. Marissa's heart grieved for him, for the worried brother that he was.

She recalled a time when she had said that she wished she and her own sister could have the close relationship which Ryan and Rachel had. Now she wasn't so sure. Because now she realised that with that closeness, that undeniable bond which was between them, came unspeakable pain. When one suffered the other did as well, if not more, from seeing their companion be put through so much.

Marissa could feel it now, when she wasn't even looking at her boyfriend, his eyes showed fear, hurt and a helplessness which came with knowing that he couldn't reach out to his sister the way he used to.

All he could do now was wait for her to come to him.

* * *

Rachel awoke early, watching as the morning sun began to creep through the curtains, slowly edging its way across the room. She could hear the soft sounds of Kurt breathing beside her, his arm still rapped firmly around her waist.

Rachel moved slightly, careful not to wake her sleeping companion. She slowly moved her hand to his wrist, removing it from around her and gently slid off the bed.

Kurt stirred and Rachel froze hoping beyond hope that he did not awaken.

She dared a look over her shoulder and couldn't help the warm feeling she received when she was him lying there bare-chested, so peaceful. Moving around the room quietly she found the singlet which he had been wearing the previous night sitting untouched on a clothes chest in the corner of the room.

Rachel looked down at her own attire, still wearing the same clothes she had arrived in and realising that they were not entirely suitable. Slipping out of her top she pulled Kurt's singlet on, before throwing her jacket over the top.

Rachel stepped out of the house, into the quiet street and began to walk.

* * *

"So, it's the weekend, what do you boys have planned?" Sandy asked interested.

He looked from Ryan to Seth and then back again as the two sat before him eating cereal. A realisation dawned on Sandy.

"On second thought, it's 9am on a Saturday, why are you two already up?"

Seth shrugged. "Couldn't sleep."

Ryan remained silent.

"You know that I have to go to work later on, only for a few hours, just to check up on some things."

They both nodded.

Ryan never lifted his eyes as he spoke. "When are you picking Rachel up?"

Sandy watched him for a moment before answering. "On the way home."

"She could walk you know, get home earlier."

"Ryan," Sandy said sitting before the boy. "If you want to see her, then go and see her."

Ryan looked up at Sandy before shaking his head, standing and leaving the table.

* * *

"Ryan would be worried sick knowing you came back."

Rachel almost laughed at Theresa's comment, thinking of all the reasons why Ryan wouldn't care that she was gone. She looked up at her old neighbour, her brother's ex girlfriend and said the simple words.

"He doesn't care."

Theresa smiled as she sat down, handing over the hot cup of coffee and looking directly at Rachel. She could see the young girl's pain, even though her face masked it. Theresa had known her since she was a baby, she had been there through every moment of her life. She knew Rachel as though she were her own child.

"You didn't give yourself the chance to find out," she commented.

Taking a quiet sip of her coffee Rachel ran the comment through her mind, but there was too much going on in there for it to process properly and the words were soon lost.

"Is there a reason why you came back?" Theresa asked honestly.

Rachel shrugged and was suddenly hit with the feeling that she had forgotten why she had returned. It almost didn't seem to matter any more, she was out of New Port, who cared about anything else?

"Maybe you should call your brother, just to let him know you're okay."

Theresa reached for the phone but Rachel was quick to catch her arm. "I call and he gets worried, freaks out and comes looking for me."

"You don't know that," Theresa insisted.

Rachel looked straight into the girl's eyes and held her gaze for a moment. "I know Ry'."

Theresa looked back, her eyes almost sad at the thought that the relationship between Rachel and Ryan had broken. She couldn't recall a time when they had not been together, and if not, never far apart.

"So do I," Theresa whispered. "I think you forget that sometimes Rach."

Rachel looked at the pretty girl sitting before her, she knew exactly why Ryan and her had been an item. Who wouldn't like someone like Theresa? She was smart, witty and incredibly beautiful.

"I'll see you later," Rachel said standing from her spot and moving toward the door.

"Rach, don't go," Theresa insisted going after her.

Rachel didn't stop, didn't turn to face her friend, she simply walked out the door speaking.

"Got people to see."

* * *

Dawn's eyes went wide as she looked up to see the reason why her front door had slammed so hard. An image of her daughter filled her vision and she had to hold onto the edge of the kitchen counter to stop herself from collapsing. Rachel looked so different, her hair was now extremely short, styled in jagged cuts around her face, and scattered with pale blonde streaks. Dawn thought it made her look beautiful, so mature.

"Rachel, oh my God, my baby."

Dawn gasped, running up to her daughter and throwing her arms around her and only pulling away when Rachel didn't return the gesture.

"How have you been? Hows Ryan?"

Rachel cocked her head to the side. "Oh, so now you're pretending to care?"

Dawn's face turned to one of shock. "Baby, I always cared."

"Cut the crap mum, you never gave a damn about us!"

Rachel pushed passed her mother aware that there was an open liqueur bottle resting half-empty on the kitchen counter.

_She'll never change,_ Rachel thought.

"Where's your brother?" Dawn asked calmly, turning around to face Rachel, watching her as she ran her fingers along the top of the far cabinets.

"Right where you left him," Rachel replied.

Dawn moved further into the house and picked up her bottle of Vodka, taking a swig before screwing up her face at the taste.

"Don't make the mistake of thinking this is a friendly catch up on old times. I need info and I need it now."

Dawn looked at her daughter seeing the complete hate for her mother evident in those golden eyes. "What are you talking about?"

"AJ and his boy Theoty are taking a group of their pals to visit Ry's old gang. What do they have planned?" Rachel said walking casually up to her mother.

"I don't know what you're saying," Dawn replied less than convincingly.

"What does AJ have planned for tonight?" Rachel asked again, this time her voice a little stronger. She was now standing directly in front of Dawn.

"Rachel..."

"I'm going to ask you _one_ more time...!"

Rachel pulled the bottle of Vodka from Dawn's hands with an aggressive strength and threw it across the room. It connected with the far wall, smashing into a thousand pieces and causing Dawn to flinch.

"And then I'm gonna get testy!" She finished looking straight into her mother's eyes.

"Okay, fine," Dawn finally said. "Maybe I do know something."

"Where?" Rachel asked calmly.

"What?"

"Where the hell is this gonna happen?" She pressed.

"They're meeting outside the milk-bar just around the corner from here. They said something about Mitch being there at midnight."

Rachel looked at her mother for a moment before the information truly sunk in. It made sense, Mitch lived above the shop, his father, the owner.

She nodded her head slightly before moving away from Dawn.

"You'll wanna take it easy on the drink, something big is going down."

Dawn ran after her daughter stopping her with a hand on her arm. "Rachel please don't get involved in this."

Rachel spun on her mother ready to attack. "If you'd have been half the mother you should have been you would know that I have _always_ been involved! Where do you think me and Ry' were all those nights? We sure as hell weren't tucked up in bed like we should have been. I wasn't the good little girl you thought I was but you were always too off your God damn face to realise it."

Dawn stood frozen as she realised what her daughter was telling her. She as horrified. Sure she knew that something was going on with Trey and Ryan, she always had, but for them to get their sister involved as well...

"Why did you do it?" Dawn asked.

"Because what else could I do?" Rachel asked. "They were the only family I had. There were people in that group who loved me more than you and _still_ do. They taught me everything that I know. _Gave_ me everything."

Dawn studied her daughter's face, instantly knowing, but having to ask to be sure. "You went out with one of them?"

Rachel smirked at the question. Was her mother that thick? "Remember Kurt?"

"Ryan's best friend?"

Rachel raised her eyebrow mischievously and Dawn instantly caught on. "But he's eighteen!" She cried.

"And I'm fifteen, big whoop."

Dawn looked away, she couldn't meet her daughters eyes. What she really needed was a drink, something to suppress the anger she was feeling at the moment, even if it were only temporary relief.

It was only then that she realised Rachel was no longer standing in the room with her.

The front door slammed again and Dawn was left alone in her house.

* * *

"Mum, how can you stand by and let him do this?"

Marissa voice was one of pleading as she and Jimmy faced off with Julie in their house. She had come by to drop off the remainder of Marissa's clothes and had not expected the two to take such a stand against her.

"Marissa, I am only doing what is right for this town," Julie replied.

"No, what you're doing is what is right for you and Caleb," Jimmy stated.

"Leave Cal out of this Jimmy."

"He's every bit a part of it though. He's the reason why you're acting like this," Marissa argued.

Julie let out a long sigh. "Look, as far as you two are concerned there is nothing you can do."

Marissa glared at her mother, hating every part of her at the moment. "If something happens to Rachel I will _never_ forgive you." And with that she stormed off to her room.

"I am not going to let something happen to this kid, she's done too much for me," Jimmy growled.

Julie only smirked. "What? Given you advice on how to live a life of crime and violence?"

"You know what Julie? I honestly think that you should get your facts straight before you start accusing people of things. Ask around, look it up. Rachel is a good person and I will not stand by and let you ruin her life. Now get out of my house!"

Julie smiled sweetly. "It would be a pleasure." She turned back to him once she was at the door. "Good afternoon Jimmy."

The answer she received was the door slamming in her face.

* * *

"Hey big brother," Rachel said walking into the yard.

Trey looked up surprised and ran up to his little sister pulling her into a warm hug which she was happy to return.

"Oh my God, Rach!"

"Why is that everyone's greeting?"

Trey pulled away and looked at her. "How have you been?"

Rachel raised a single eyebrow and took the chair, which her brother offered. "Don't get me started."

Trey was curious as to why she was visiting him; not that he needed a reason. "Where's Ryan?" He asked.

Rachel looked up. "Trey, can we not...?"

This reaction instantly answered Trey's next question. _Why are you here?_

"I just...I wanted to talk to you."

Trey narrowed his eyes and leaned forward on his elbows casting a quick glance to the prison guard who was standing just out of listening range.

"Is everything okay?" He asked concerned.

Rachel let out a small breath. "I dunno."

She bit her bottom lip trying her hardest not to break down right there and then. In the presence of her older brother she felt as though she could do anything and she wouldn't be judged.

"I think I did something that I shouldn't have done...and..."

"Yeah..." Trey pressed.

Rachel tried to find the words. "I dunno if I should take it back."

Trey narrowed his eyes. "Is it something you regret?"

Rachel looked away from him, not wanting him to see past her fake strength and into the real reason why she was here.

"I don't..."

Trey watched as Rachel ran a hand up and down her left arm as though she were cold. His eyes instantly fell on the scars, which lay along her wrist.

"Hey," he said moving closer and looking at her. "Did someone hurt you?"

Rachel met his eyes; her own shaky and Trey instantly knew what had happened.

"Oh, Sweet Baby," he said using his childhood nickname for her as he pulled her into a close hug. "I'll do anything for you, I just don't want you to cry."

Rachel melted into her brother's embrace and for the first time in months she felt as though she could trust someone with her life, with anything.

"That's the thing," she said. "I can't even cry any more. I try so hard but my body won't let me."

She pulled away and looked toward the ground.

"Where are you staying?" Trey asked.

"Kurt's," Rachel replied.

"Now listen here. You tell that boy that if he tries anything and I mean _anything_, he'll have to deal with me."

Rachel nodded reluctantly. "Okay."

"So why'd you do it?" He asked honestly.

"I...I don't know."

Trey could see the obvious pain in Rachel's eyes, she had clearly not spoken to anyone about this. The way she seemed to cower away from the subject only because it meant letting out what she was truly feeling inside.

"So...I'd better..." Rachel said indicating that it was time for her to leave.

"Yeah," Trey nodded.

As they stood he smiled warmly at her and it made Rachel feel happy that she had come to see him.

"It was good to see a familiar face," he said.

"Ditto."

"So, I'll see you 'round little sis."

Rachel nodded before turning to leave. "Thanks Trey."

* * *

Later that night as Kirsten filled the dinner plates before her with the contents for the take-away containers Sandy walked in with a worried look on his face.

"What's wrong?" She asked, flicking Seth's hand away as he went to take an olive from the mixed salad.

"I'm a growing boy, I need my nutrients," he protested.

"You can wait five minutes," Kirsten stated.

"But by that time I'll be a withered piece of nothing. You won't be able to see me from side on."

"Seth..."

"Okay, okay."

Ryan moved over to Sandy with a frown on his face. "What is it?"

"I just went over to Monica's – the girl Rachel was staying with – and she said that Rachel never went there. They didn't even have plans."

Seth's attention instantly snapped to his father, his hunger pains forgotten. "So you're saying she made it all up, and for the past day and half we don't know where she's been?"

Sandy looked over at his son with worried eyes and Seth knew that he was right on the money with his question.

"That's not like her," Kirsten said.

Sandy shook his head and leaned on the bench-top in defeat. "Lately I don't know what gotten into her."

"Anything could have happened to her," Seth stated.

Ryan watched as the three processed the information, not really feeling anything except for the undeniable need to hit something. How could Rachel have done this? Didn't she have enough sense to think that they would worry? Then other thoughts came into his mind. His baby sister was out there, alone, with no one to look out for her...

"She's run away before," Kirsten said calmly.

Ryan spoke up for the first time in the conversation. "That was different," he said. "Last time she _wanted_ to be found."

The conversation continued for a moment before it was interrupted by a booming voice.

"Good evening all!" Caleb cheered.

"Dad, this is not a good time," Kirsten insisted.

Caleb only smiled at her mockingly. "I think this is a wonderful time Kikki."

"Caleb, we're having a serious conversation," Sandy stated.

Caleb looked at his son in-law with a strong curiosity. "Really? What about?"

"Rachel's run away again," Seth spoke.

"We don't know that," Kirsten interrupted.

Ryan looked at her sadly. "Yes we do," he murmured.

Caleb titled his head and shook it with a fake concern. "Such a shame."

Ryan was instantly drawn to the action, the look of glee in the mans eyes. Something wasn't right.

"You know something," Ryan said. It was a statement rather than a question.

Caleb pointed to himself innocently. "Who, me?"

"What the hell did you do?" Ryan growled walking up to him and meeting the man head on.

Caleb smiled. "Only what she asked. The dear child _wanted_ to go back."

The rest of the family was now realising what Caleb was saying, what Ryan had picked up in the old mans voice. Kirsten stepped forward a look of horror on her face.

"Dad, you didn't," she said wanting to believe that it wasn't true.

"Oh, I did."

"How the hell could you just let her leave like that?" Ryan screamed forcing himself not to hit the man in front of him. "Do you have any idea how much _danger_ she is in going back there?"

Caleb only shrugged absently. "What's for dinner?"

Ryan growled low in his throat, he couldn't let this continue. His sister had gone back to the place they had grown up and he knew all too well what that could mean for her. Moving away from them Ryan grabbed the car keys, which sat on the wooden, nail board.

"Where are you going?" Sandy asked.

Ryan didn't stop his movement. "To get her back."

Seth instantly sprang to his friend's side. "I'm going too."

Kirsten looked at the two young men standing so proud, leaving to rescue the one they loved. "Be careful," was all that she said.

"Oh yes," Caleb said. "We wouldn't want anything to happen to the girl."

Ryan stormed up to him, looked him in the eyes and punched him directly in the face. Caleb staggered back holding onto his now bleeding nose.

"Let me tell you something you sick bastard," Ryan breathed. "No one messes with my family. No one!"

_**TO BE CONTINUED.........**_

(Hey, hey. How are you all? Hope you're liking it. I know this chapter was a bit long but I couldn't fit everything that I wanted to into it without it being this way. So, what's in store for the next chapter? It's based fully in Chino, though I might add in a little New Port if I feel like it. Basically it's the race against time to get to Rachel before she goes along with Kurt and his peeps to the huge fight. Please R R)


	12. The Confrontation

_**THE CONFRONTATION **_

_I watch the heavens but I find no calling_

_Something I can do to change what's coming_

_Stay close to me while the sky is falling_

_I don't want to be left alone_

_World On Fire_

_Sarah McLachlan_

Kurt pulled away and looked at her strongly, his face so close to hers. As a smile grew on his face he moved a hand up to the sleave of Rachel's top and began to edge it off her shoulder.

Kurt's lips met his lovers again with more passion than before as his right hand began to remove the other sleave, now pulling both sides down.

Rachel broke the kiss. "Kurt, no."

Trying to pull away she pressed her hands to his chest and pushed slightly attempting to make him stop.

"You want this, we both do," Kurt stated letting his hands leave her arms and travel down to her waist.

"No, _I_ don't," Rachel insisted trying again to break his hold.

But Kurt wasn't taking no for an answer, and continued what he started, Rachel feeling one of his hands on her thigh now. He kissed her again, with a strong urgency pushing her back into the fabric of the sofa where they sat and pulling her under him.

"Kurt..." Rachel began.

Kurt pressed his lips to her again and it was only when Rachel felt his hands travel down to the belt on her jeans that she began to forcefully struggle against him.

"Kurt, get off me!"

"Babe just trust me," he replied unfastening the buckle.

"No," Rachel managed fighting against his hold and finally managing to struggle out from under him.

She moved to the other side of the room re-doing her belt up, tighter than before. Kurt rolled his eyes and huffed, sitting back casually on the sofa.

"What part of 'no' don't you understand?" Rachel fumed.

"The 'no' part," Kurt smirked.

Rachel looked at him in disgust her eyes wide in shock and fear. The instant Kurt saw this though; he softened and moved to her taking her into his arms. Rachel ripped his arms from around her and only stared at him.

"Babe, we haven't done anything since you got back."

"What, you can't go a whole _day_ without sex?" Rachel screamed.

Kurt shrugged. "We used to have all sorts of fun."

"That was _then_!" Rachel growled. "This is _now_!"

He only glared at her with accusing eyes. "There's someone else, isn't there?"

Rachel stopped short at the question, her mind ticking back to the previous relationship she and Seth had had. It had been magical, almost _too_ good to be true. He had treated her with so much love, never forced himself upon her like this, only did things she was comfortable with. It was only then that Rachel realised just how different Kurt and Seth were...

"There was," Rachel answered calmly. "I ended it."

Kurt smirked at her. "Wasn't he good enough? Didn't have the skills I do?"

Rachel couldn't believe what she was hearing. What had happened to the Kurt she used to know? The one, which stood before her, didn't care about anything but himself. He was crude, forceful, almost accusing of everything she did.

"Are you okay?" Kurt asked honestly.

Rachel only stared at him not processing anything that was happening. What had just happened? Had she just compared all of Kurt's bad traits with Seth's good ones?

Kurt moved forward and placed a hand on Rachel's arm.

"Don't touch me!" She screamed pulling away.

"Babe..."

"Call me that one more time and I'll kill you."

Kurt stopped short at the comment but only smiled at the girls reaction to what he had done.

Rachel took one more look at Kurt before turning and running out of the house.

* * *

It was ten minutes to midnight and Seth's gaze travelled out of the window next to him and into the street Ryan was driving down. The pale pools of colour the scattered streetlights made were enough for him to be able to make out the many mobile homes, which lined the street.

He knew they were there, Ryan didn't have to say anything. This was it. The place where he and Rachel had spent their entire childhoods growing up, learning all they knew. Seth could tell it would be easy to fall into the wrong crowd here. His eyes constantly fell on groups of men, young and old and woman, some barely in their teens loitering around certain area's looking for trouble.

When Ryan pulled into a driveway Seth had a sudden feeling of dread. Would this be where Rachel was? Or was she somewhere else, where they couldn't find her?

"Come on," Ryan said climbing out of the car, Seth not far behind.

They walked up the drive where Ryan knocked loudly on the front door. After moment the door opened to reveal a beautiful young girl. By Seth's judgement she was around their age, with long brown hair and dark inquisitive eyes.

"Ryan!" She screamed throwing her arms around the Atwood boy as a greeting.

"Hey Theresa," Ryan replied once they had parted. "This is Seth."

"Hi."

"Nice to meet you," Seth replied.

Theresa's eyes fell on Ryan once again and she instantly knew that he had not travelled all this was for a social visit.

"I don't know where she is Ryan," Theresa answered honestly.

Seth's face dropped. "What? You mean...?"

"She stopped by earlier today, but left pretty quickly, said something about having people to see."

Ryan was studying Theresa's face, he had known the girl long enough to know when she was hiding something. Or at least knew more than she was letting on.

"What is it?" he asked.

Theresa looked directly at him, never letting her gaze leave his. "She's been with Kurt," she began. "I think she might go to the fight tonight."

"What fight?" Seth asked frantically. "Who's Kurt?"

Ryan however remained calm, almost too calm. "Where is it?"

"At the milk bar down the road. Theoty and his boys are going after Mitch, something about revenge for an incident of some sort. Arturo's going too, she might be with him, I'm not sure."

Ryan was nodding his head slowly. Mitch had always been one to get himself in too much trouble for his own good. It was times like these when Ryan and Kurt would sit him down and explain that they didn't appreciate him putting them and the rest of their friends in danger.

Now Rachel had been dragged into it, for a reason Ryan could only guess was Kurt himself. The two had been an item when they lived in Chino. Constantly together, barely having time for anyone else. But Ryan also knew that Kurt was not all fun and games. He had a dark side. One which consisted of only wanting to please himself and not caring about anyone else.

During their relationship, nothing to Ryan's knowledge had happened to cause any concern that this particular side was beginning to surface. However, now that Rachel was back in her ex-lovers arms, after so long apart for him, he could only image what things Kurt would be up to.

However, despite this, knowing that Arturo, Theresa's older brother and friend of himself and Try was looking out for her brought Ryan a small sense of relief.

"Okay," Ryan finally said. "We'll head down there. Do you know when the fights meant to happen?"

"As far as I know, any time from now on," Theresa answered.

_God I hope we're not too late_, Ryan thought.

* * *

Gun shots blared through the night signally the beginning of the end. Rachel felt Arturo move by her side and looked over to him only to see him look straight back.

"You shouldn't be here girl," he said calmly.

"You know me Art," Rachel replied. "Never one to miss a fight."

He looked at her strongly knowing that she could handle her own but at the same time not wanting anything to happen to Trey's younger sister. He had known her since she was a baby, unlike her brothers who had spent much of their time in Fresno until their father was arrested, Rachel had grown up in Chino, she knew no where else accept New Port.

"Stay close," he stated.

Rachel nodded before feeling something light be placed in her hand. It was a gun, Arturo's favourite if she remembered correctly. She looked down at it before looking out from her position behind the milk bar's brick wall. She saw what she had expected. Two groups of men, some only teens some well into their twenties, guns poised and ready to shoot. Mitch stood to one side, Rondell and Kurt next to him. They were shielded by a nearby bus stop preventing any bullets from reaching them.

"Come out you bastards!" Theoty yelled.

Rachel had only ever seen him once before. Broad shouldered and muscular he looked more like a wrestler than anything else. Jet black hair slicked back, eyes narrow as they searched the street light lit road for any signs of movement. Rachel could only see his back from the position she was in but she was sure he would be smiling.

_They always smile_, she thought.

At that instant Kurt stepped out from behind his post shooting a man dead before her eyes. It was then that all hell broke loose.

* * *

Ryan and Seth ran like there was no tomorrow, both of them breathing hard as they rounded the corner to the milk bar and stopped dead in their tracks. Guns were firing back and forth, and a sudden punch up erupted before their eyes between a group of young men Ryan only knew the faces of.

"Come on," he whispered jogging toward the outskirts of the massacre.

It was only then that Seth spotted what he had been dreading. ran from her hiding spot, keeping low as she dashed out into the open. Bullets flew around her head.

Ryan broke from Seth's side running toward the side of the milk bar and up to the man who they had seen fire the first deadly bullet. Seth ran hot on his heals.

"Kurt, what the hell is going on?" Ryan demanded.

"Ryan my boy, I was wondering when you were gonna show," he answered.

_Kurt_, Seth thought. _That's the guy Theresa was talking about.._

"This your entourage?" Kurt asked coldly looking at Seth.

"Just here to get a friend out," Seth answered.

Kurt looked him up and down for a moment, studying his demeanour.

"So you're the guy," he said causing both Seth and Ryan to stop.

"What guy?" Ryan asked.

"That one who went for a tumble with my girl Rachel."

Seth froze. His girl? What was he talking...?

And then he knew. Kurt was not only some person who had been in Rachel's life, he had been her boyfriend and now he knew that Seth had moved in on his territory.

"Yeah," Seth said standing a little taller.

"I can see why she came running back to me."

"Oh God," Ryan said and Seth diverted his eyes back to the killing field where he saw five men turn their guns to Rachel as she sprinted to the opposite side of the street.

As the guns went off Rachel covered her head with her hands running to a park cars before bracing her hands on the bonnet and rolling over to the other side where she dropped to the ground unharmed and shielded.

"We have to get her out of here," Seth whispered.

Ryan looked to Kurt who knew what he wanted. Handing over his spare gun he gave Ryan a nod.

The bullets were beginning to ease now, the gangs decided to finish the fight the old fashion way. With fists and knives. Ryan took this opportunity to tell Seth to move when he gave the signal and began to run toward his sister. But even he didn't see the man who intercepted him before it was too late. Seth turned around and Kurt was gone.

* * *

two strong hands on her shoulders and whirled around to see Kurt standing there a wicked smile plastered on his face. She could feel her body shaking from his touch, a killers touch.

"Get off me," she whispered.

Kurt tilted his head. "I will once I'm done with you. Fight's almost over and we're going back to my place to celebrate our win Babe."

"I told you..."

Rachel began suddenly whipping out the gun that Arturo had given her and holding it out, barrel pressed against Kurt's chest.

"Not to call me _Babe_."

Kurt noticeably froze not expecting such a reaction. "Come on Rachel, put down the gun."

"You know what ass hole, I'm not in the mood to take your bullshit orders right now so if I were you I would shut the hell up!" Rachel screamed pressing the barrel deeper into his flesh her finger lingering over the trigger.

Kurt looked at her strongly. "You don't want to do this."

"Don't I? You wanna know something? I finally realised why I went back to you, cos I had to go back to realise I _don't_ need you. You're _nothing_ and will always be nothing."

"You came back for _me_?" Kurt asked interested.

"I came back because I had to get away and you just happened to be what was up for sale."

"And you _love_ what you bought."

Rachel's finger tightened on the trigger and she thought she would have pulled it if it were not for the fact that now Kurt had his own gun out and pointed directly at her.

"Gotta have some insurance," he smirked.

Rachel only shook her head in disapproval as she spread her arms wide letting her gun go loose in her hands. "Go ahead. Kill me, I've got nothing to lose."

It was then that Seth spotted them. After seeing Ryan be pulled away into the crowd he had taken it upon himself to save Rachel. Now he stood in the centre of the road watching from a distance, not wanting to move too soon.

Kurt's eyes lingered on Rachel's for a moment knowing that she wasn't afraid, death was something she used to face all the time. Kurt nodded his head and smiled at her.

Rachel closed her eyes and waited for the impact.

A gunshot rang through the night, loud and fierce, piercing through the shouts and sounds of fists connecting with faces.

A familiar scream ripped through the violent atmosphere and Rachel's eyes sprang open as she realised that the bullet had not connected with her but rather someone else. She knew the voice.

"Got nothing to lose?" Kurt asked sarcastically looking down at her his gun pointed to something out in the distance.

Rachel spun around at the sound of someone she loved screaming in agony. Her eyes fell on Seth as his body slumped to the floor, hand pressing tightly against the wound which was bleeding heavily in his shoulder.

"Seth!" Rachel screamed breaking away from Kurt and beginning to run to him.

"Oh no you don't," Kurt said grabbing her arm and twisting her back toward him.

"Let me go!" Rachel screamed fighting against his strength.

Kurt brought up his hand and punched her across the face with so much force that Rachel fell to the ground from the impact, her forehead cut and bleeding.

"You're a bastard," she cringed slowly climbing to her feet again.

"Just wanted to buy enough time for your little lover boy to die," Kurt answered before seeing her eyes go wide.

Rachel spun away from him running as fast as she could toward Seth. She fell to her knees beside him, her breath coming short as she caught a glimpse at his wound. Rachel felt her heart tighten at the sight and she could only think of one reason why. She still loved him. Had never stopped loving him, even when she left New Port her heart had remained there.

"Seth, Oh God..."

Seth's eyes opened slowly as Rachel began to brush his hair out of his face, not knowing what else to do. She felt completely helpless. This was all her fault.

"Rach..." Seth breathed.

Rachel's eyes fell on him as she heard him speak, her hands still on either side of his face.

"I missed you," Seth began.

Rachel wanted to cry, to scream out and release the emotions, which she was feeling. But her body wouldn't let her. She was shaking in terror of what was to come.

"I missed you too," Rachel replied. "God I missed you."

Seth let on a slight smile and though the agony he was feeling was something he had never felt before, having Rachel with him, safe, somehow made it seem like a distant feeling.

"I'm so sorry for everything. I should have stopped it," Seth began.

Rachel shook her head in horror. "No," she said frowning. "Don't say that. Just hold on okay? Please, hold on."

She tore the bottom of the top she wore off and rapped it around her hand, pressing it to Seth's wound in an attempt to slow the blood loss. Rachel heard him take in a short breath and flinch in pain.

Seth looked up at Rachel's face and only then realised she was staring straight back at him.

"You look different," he said. "Your hair..." he realised moving his hand to her face.

Rachel couldn't help the slight smile, which creeped along her face, the first one she had experienced in almost a month. Only Seth would take the time, even as he lay there with a mortal wound, to compliment her.

"It's been so long since I touched you," he whispered.

Rachel looked down at him, her gaze steady and brought her free hand to the one which he had on the side of her face. She gently took it in hers seeing Seth frown as she did. Taking in a deep breath Rachel placed his hand over her heart wanting him to know that he never lost her. He could always touch her, no matter what.

Seth smiled. "Thump, thump. Thump, thump," he whispered. "It's going fast."

Rachel forced back the tears that threatened to escape her eyes and moved her face closer to Seth's, her one true loves.

"That's what you do to me," she said honestly.

And it was true. There was no one else in the world that could make Rachel feel like Seth did, and not just in the physical sense. He was her emotional strength. Her guidance in times of darkness.

Seth suddenly began to cough loudly as the impact of the wound finally began to take a hold on him.

"Seth, hold on. _Please_," Rachel begged not knowing what to do.

Ryan was nowhere to be seen and the only people who were in range of them were preoccupied with attacking each other. She felt completely helpless, sitting there with someone she cared about more than life itself, watching him slowly die before her eyes.

"I can't lose you Seth," Rachel whispered. "I need you."

Seth's breathing was becoming shallow now. "I won't leave you."

"I know," Rachel replied fighting against her body which was now violently shaking.

Seth took one last breath and looked deep within her eyes seeing all her beauty layed out before him and wanting to hold onto it.

"Will you come home now?"

Rachel sat in silence at his question, she didn't know what to say. It was only when his eyes began to slowly close that she snapped back into the reality of what was happening. She looked at him. She loved him.

Seth took a final breath and his eyes closed.

Rachel couldn't move, she felt completely numb. Suddenly there were two strong hands on her arms, lifting her from the ground and pulling her away from Seth.

"No!" She screamed fighting against them. "Seth!"

"We gotta go Rach, cops are coming," Arturo answered strongly dragging her away.

Rachel saw Ryan break away from the now scattering crowd and run to his friend's side, and caught the faint words, which escaped his lips as he looked to Rondell standing beside him.

"He's still got a pulse."

Rachel's heart sank, she didn't know what to do. Couldn't do anything but fight against Arturo hold on her and try to run back to Seth's side. She didn't want to leave him. Didn't want to see him suffer all alone.

"Seth!" She screamed.

Arturo kept a tight hold on her and soon they were moving away from the crowds and further into the darkness of the street.

"Let me go!" Rachel yelled, struggling against him.

"There's nothing you can do now, I've gotta get you somewhere safe," he answered.

"No, I have to get back to him!" Rachel was forcefully fighting against him now, trying to tare out of his grip.

Arturo turned to face her still holding her arms. "Rach, it's over."

Rachel looked up at him, eyes wide, before collapsing against his body.

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Hello everyone. So now you know what happens. What do you think? I know you'll probably be completely pissed off at me for what happened to Seth but have a little faith my friends. This is The OC where nothing is at it seems and there are twists and turns at every corner. Will post ASAP. PLEASE REVIEW, it is this time in the story when I need all your opinions, suggestions etc even if it is just one sentence saying that you like it/ or don't like it so far.)


	13. The Resentment

**_THE RESENTMENT_**

_I don't know what I was looking for_

_When I went home I found me alone_

_And sometimes I need someone to say_

'_You'll be alright'_

_Back Home_

_Yellowcard_

"Where is she?" Kurt screamed pushing past Theresa and storming into the house.

"Kurt get out!" Theresa insisted moving toward him but Kurt only brushed her away.

"Where the hell is she?" He yelled again.

"She's here," Rachel said stepping out from inside a doorway.

Kurt glared at her and was about to approach when Arturo stepped out from behind Rachel and moved between them.

"You're not gonna touch her," Arturo growled.

Kurt smirked and cocked his head to the side. "And what makes you think that?"

Arturo took one step forward and Rachel watched as Kurt tensed. He looked at her strongly seeing the cut above her eyebrow and knowing full well that he had caused it.

"Fine, whatever, I don't need you," he said before spitting at their feet. "Get your stuff or it's getting chucked out."

Arturo looked at Rachel before nodding. "I'll get it now." He gave her hand a small squeeze before moving off with a not so happy Kurt.

* * *

He could only feel one thing, pain, blinding pain in his left shoulder as he slowly slipped back into consciousness. He could hear the faint chatter of his parents, both sitting beside him.

"Seth?" Kirsten asked looking closely at him.

Seth let on a weak smile as his eyes slowly opened. "Mum, hey."

"Oh thank God," Sandy whispered as he saw his son smile and speak. "We were so worried."

"Yeah, you gave us a bit of a scare there man," Ryan said from the opposite side of the room where he stood, arms crossed.

Seth frowned at the comment before letting his eyes travel around his hospital room, a hospital he didn't know.

"Where am I?" He asked to no one in particular.

"Hospital just outside of Chino, it was the closest one," Ryan answered.

Seth looked at him their eyes meeting in a silent acknowledgment of thanks. He could see that Ryan had been injured, his face cut and arms bruised. It was then that Seth's mind ticked back to his final stages of consciousness before he had blacked out from the blood loss.

"Rachel," he insisted. "Where is she? Is she okay?"

Seth tried to sit up but the pain he felt was too great and he only succeeded in causing himself to cry out in pain.

"Take it easy son," Sandy insisted. "We don't want to have to sit through one of your complaining shows because you hurt yourself."

"Yeah, you have a tendency to over-react," Ryan added.

Seth could tell that they were trying to avoid the subject of Rachel, clearly it was too hard for them to talk about but Seth didn't care. He wanted to know.

"Just tell me she's okay," he said looking to his mother for help.

Kirsten smiled warmly and nodded her head. "She's fine."

Seth took in a breath before closing his eyes again.

* * *

Seth looked at Anna who was sitting beside his bed chatting loudly about the latest adventures Captain Oats had been on. He was more than happy that she had come to visit him, driving the entire way because she was so concerned. But despite this Seth wasn't really listening, his mind was wondering back to the previous night's events. In particular, what Rachel had said to him...

"_I need you."_

What had she meant by that? Seth had seen the pure regret in her eyes for getting him in such a situation. She blamed herself entirely. But what Seth didn't understand was if she still had feelings for him, if she still loved him the way she used to. He wanted to know so desperately that it almost killed him inside.

As Anna continued to talk his eyes travelled around the room as a fake smile came over his face. His focus only came back when his gaze fell on the figure in the doorway. Rachel stood there, her arms crossed insecurely over her chest. Her eyes met his for a moment, lingering there.

No words needed to be spoken between the pair, they both knew what they were thinking. What had happened between them last night?

Seth felt his breath shorten seeing Rachel standing there, scared to move to him, scared of what he would say. But he wanted to be holding her. To be taking comfort in her warm embrace. He knew that she could see Anna sitting there, rambling happily, holding his hand in hers.

"So what do you think Seth?"

Seth was snapped back into reality at Anna saying his name. He tore his eyes away from Rachel and focused them on the girl sitting beside him.

"What?"

"Do you want me to get Captain Oats to deliver you some comic books or should we let him continue his date with the mysterious Cinderella Barbie?"

Seth raised his eyebrows. "That's a very mature thing to be asking."

Anna laughed, loud and joyous at her friend's joke. Seth could see her entire face lighting up at his humour and he took the opportunity to flick his yes back to the doorway.

There was no one there.

* * *

The next morning Rachel sat in silence, aware that Theresa was watching her, was trying to think of what to say to break the tension. Part of her wanted her friend to speak, to take her mind off all of the emotions, which she felt at that moment. But at the same time she couldn't shake the feeling that if she began to speak she wouldn't be able to stop.

She had seen Seth in the hospital with Anna, been afraid to speak to him, to go near him. She didn't want Seth to see her the way she was now, completely torn apart inside, filled with guilt.

She blamed herself for what had happened, for him getting hurt. How could she have put him in so much danger? Rachel felt so helpless, almost dirty at the thought.

This was someone whom she loved so dearly and she had nearly killed him.

What was happening to her? It was not just now, it had started long ago, when Caleb and Julie first walked through the Cohen's front door and into her life she had been changing. Becoming everything that she didn't want to be. The girl who was hard on the inside, just waiting for someone to push her the wrong way and snap. But that girl also came with an expiry date. After a while all those emotions, which had been bottled up inside her, had to find a way to break loose. And this was now.

There was a loud knock at the door and Theresa left her spot, watching Rachel as she sat silently in the lounge, not saying anything. When she swung the door open, Ryan stood there.

"Ryan, you're okay, thank God."

Ryan shrugged slightly. "Yeah."

"I heard what happened," Theresa explained. "I was so worried you might have been hurt."

"I'm okay," he replied. "Is she here?"

Theresa nodded. "She's just..." she said stepping aside.

Rachel stood there catching them both slightly by surprise, her sad eyes met Ryan's before she looked away.

"I'll leave you two to it," Theresa said moving away from the pair and further into the house.

Ryan and Rachel stood there in silence for a long time, neither knowing what to say to each other. Ryan could see the pain in Rachel's eyes, she was no longer trying to hide it.

He could also see her injuries. Eye bruised. A gash just above her eyebrow. She looked defeated as though everything has hit her all at once and she had no defence mechanisms to fight off the full impact of the assault.

"How is he?" Rachel whispered.

"Alive," Ryan answered knowing exactly whom she was referring to. "Doctor's said he'll be in pain for a while but we can take him home."

"Okay..."

Rachel lowered her eyes to the ground not wanting to look at her brother. She just couldn't. She didn't want him to see what she had become, what she had been lowered to. It was too painful.

"You know none of this would have happened if you had just talked to someone," Ryan said strongly causing Rachel to look up at him.

"You don't think I know that?"

Another silence swept over them and Ryan could see just how much she was ashamed of herself. She couldn't even bring herself to look him directly in the eyes, something she used to do so frequently.

Part of him was aching at the thought that she had given up on herself, she wasn't even turning to him for guidance.

"They want you back," Ryan said. "Sandy and Kirsten told me not to leave without you."

Rachel almost laughed at the comment. "Why the hell would they want me back?"

"Because they care about you," Ryan said plainly.

Rachel looked away from him. "You couldn't have said that will less feeling if you tried."

"Yeah, well," Ryan said his voice rising. "I'm not exactly the happiest person in the world right now, Rachel."

"Ryan..."

Rachel began but cut herself off when her eyes met her brothers. He was one of the few people in the world who would always love her unconditionally. Even as he stood there now, it utter anger at what his sister had done, she knew that he still loved her. He would still help her through anything. Always be there, no matter what.

Rachel looked at him, into his eyes as she spoke the words.

"Just go."

Ryan's face turned to shock. "I can't just leave you here!"

"You _can_, and you _are_. I can't...I can't go back there. Not after everything that's happened."

Ryan was silent now, and it made Rachel want to scream at him. To make him speak. When he finally spoke, his voice was low, almost accusing.

"So you're just gonna cop out now?"

Rachel let out a breath and turned to walk away. "Can we _not_ do this." The words were a statement rather than a question.

"No Rachel!" Ryan yelled grabbing her arm and forcing her to stop as she flinched in pain from where Kurt had bruised her the previous night as she attempted to reach Seth's side. "We are gonna do this. You have to learn that not everything always goes your way."

Rachel whirled around and faced her brother again. "And you have to learn when to let go. We both know that this isn't going to work."

"Because you're not willing to give it a go."

"I _have_ given it a go, and it screwed me over more than once!" Rachel calmed herself then and looked at her brother in defeat. "What do you want from me Ry'?"

"What I want is the sister I know to come back. The one who wouldn't just abandon the people who love her. You have no idea what you've done to that family," Ryan answered.

Rachel hung her head slightly thinking about everything that she had put the Cohen's through. On top of getting their son hurt she had disrespected them by walking out in her time of need. She gave up on them.

"That's why I can't go back to them."

Ryan stared at her and felt his stomach twist at the sight. "So this is it?"

Rachel wanted to say no. She wanted to have him throw his arms around her and say that everything would be alright, that she could go back to New Port and nothing else would go wrong. But she couldn't face the Cohen's, not after what happened to Seth, not after what she put them through.

"Goodbye Ryan," she whispered.

Ryan looked at her with pained eyes. He didn't want to leave. He didn't want to see his sister thinking that she couldn't go back to the place where people loved her. Where they would take care of her. Ryan wanted to look after her.

"Goodbye Rachel," he murmured.

Ryan turned to leave, walking back out the front door and onto the porch and it was only then that Rachel glimpsed the package he held. As though reading her mind Ryan stopped and turned to face her again.

"I thought you might like it," he said handing over the present. "Happy birthday."

Rachel stared at Ryan's retreating back, watching him blankly as he walked up to the Range Rover, climbed in and drove away.

She looked down at the package she held, rapped in a metallic turquoise colour. She had completely forgotten it was her birthday. Today. She was sixteen. Somehow knowing that Ryan remembered made her feel even worse than she already did. He would always remember.

Sitting down slowly on the front steps Rachel began to unwrap the paper. Once it was all lying beside her, she flipped over the present to reveal a pale yellow picture frame lined with shells. But it was not the beauty of the frame, which captured her eye, it was the picture within it.

Rachel's eyes fell on the three children, smiling happily at the camera. One was her, lying across Trey and Ryan's laps as they pretended to each her whole. Rachel could see that she was screaming, but not it fear, in laughter. It wasn't the fake happiness that she had grown accustomed to, but rather one of purity. Being there in her two older brother's arms, knowing that neither of them would ever let anything happen to her.

Rachel reached out and touched the face to Trey's younger persona. She could remember the day so clearly. Rain pelted down on the house, lightening struck and thunder roared. In sadness, she had sat alone in her bedroom, staring out the window and wishing she could play outside. Ryan and Trey, became aware of her sadness and took it upon themselves to amuse her as two loving brothers did.

They had always just wanted to protect her, particularly Ryan. After their mother began seeing AJ, a violent drunk, and Trey was sent away for the first time Ryan had looked out for her. All he wanted was to keep his baby sister safe from the big bad world, which he knew.

There was nothing that he wouldn't do for her, nothing that she asked was too much. She could remember the first time that Trey had been arrested, the pain that she had felt from seeing her eldest brother leave her side and not knowing how long it would be until he returned. She could still feel it now, that sense of helplessness in thinking that there would be no one there to protect her any more.

But Ryan was there. He had always been. From day one, even in the smallest of ways. She had taken comfort in his presence, which had made her time away from Trey more bearable. It had been the beginning of a beautiful relationship with her other brother. A relationship, which stood the test of time, seemed to be unbreakable.

Until now.

Rachel's eyes fell on her own, on the happy little girl she had once been. It hurt more than anything she ever felt to see what she had left behind as she grew older. What she had become.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered to the unknowing girl, laying there in happiness, pure and content.

Rachel buried her face in her hands, the full impact of the past month falling upon her in a rushed onslaught of emotions. She didn't know it was possible to feel so much pain and be so frightened all at the same time.

For the first time in weeks, Rachel cried.

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Hey hey. Well now you know what happens. Big fight. Big loss. What

else? I really hoped you likes this chapter and again I must stress that I

want as many reviews as humanly possible from all of you especially as

we near the end of the story. Oh yes, it is nearly finished. I'm tossing

up a bit between sequel – again – and no sequel. What do you think? In

the next chapter...well you're gonna have to read to find out.)


	14. The Beauty Behind The Lies

_**THE BEAUTY BEHIND THE LIES **_

_If the face inside can't see the light_

_I know I'll have to walk alone_

_And if I walk alone to the other side_

_I know I might not make it home_

_Faceless Man _

_Creed_

Rachel stood in shock as her eyes fell on Jimmy standing before her...in Theresa's doorway...in Chino.

"Hey kid," he said.

Rachel didn't know what to say, she couldn't believe that he was here, he had travelled all that way to see her. To bring her home.

"Hey..." she replied softly.

"How you doing?"

Rachel almost laughed. Couldn't he tell?

"Why?"

"Because I want to know how you're doing," he said.

"I've been better."

They stood there in silence for a moment each knowing the exact reason why Jimmy was there. Despite this, Rachel didn't think that she could handle having to explain herself again, having to delve deep into the emotions which were so close to over-running her body.

"You gave up on them..." Jimmy whispered.

Rachel looked to the ground, for some reason she felt as though she could talk to Jimmy about what she was going through, but despite this, she wasn't going to let him win without a fight.

"I gave up on myself, they had nothing to do with it," Rachel replied.

Jimmy smiled at made her meet his eyes. "What happened to second chances?" he asked quoting her own previous advice to him.

Rachel looked back at him strongly. "I've had my second chance Jimmy. I've passed my third and am on my fourth. Get it?"

Jimmy only shrugged. "Something I've learned about the people in New Port is that one minute you think you know someone and then suddenly you don't."

"I don't need this, not from you," Rachel stated before turning her back on Jimmy and walking into the house feeling that this conversation was going the same way that her last one with Ryan had.

"Why?" Jimmy asked following her. "Because when you look at me you see what you used to stand for? Someone who has taken the chance to redeem themselves."

"Because," Rachel began whirling back around to face him. "I see what I used to be. I used to think that everything would go away if I just had faith in the people around me. Well Jimmy, let me tell you that is a load of bullshit."

Jimmy stopped short at her strong words and Rachel instantly regretted yelling at him. He was only trying to help.

"You can still become this," Jimmy said watching her as she dropped onto the sofa.

"Why would I want to do that?"

"Because you know you can and you're afraid to go back because of all of the pain."

Rachel smirked. "I don't need to go back to feel pain."

"Then what do you have to lose?"

"More than I have to gain!" Rachel yelled. "Am I talking to a brick wall?"

Jimmy began to walk around the small lounge room taking in every detail. The photos in the frames, the colour pain on the walls. He continued to walk as he spoke.

"You know Ryan hasn't left the pool house since he came back. He just sits there watching the phone expecting you to call. Maybe not _expecting_ – more _hoping_."

Rachel felt her chest tighten at the mention of her brother. She knew how he was feeling right now. All she wanted was to speak to him, to see him one more time. Rachel felt as though her security blanket had been ripped out from under her when he wasn't around. When she couldn't see him.

"Tell him to let it go," Rachel whispered forcing back the tears which threatened to escape her eyes.

"See," Jimmy said sitting down beside her. "That's where you're thinking wrong. None of us can just let it go – especially Ryan – because you're too special. We know you're better than this."

"What I _am_," Rachel said standing up. "Is the misguided, younger sister of two criminal brothers, daughter of a drunken mother, self mutilating girl from Chino who doesn't deserve half the stuff she had. Especially not an entire town trying to get me back."

"Why not?" Jimmy asked simply.

"Because I don't mean that much. People like you think it's smart to have dreams, but when you're from here, what makes you smart is knowing they don't come true."

Jimmy smiled at her. "Ryan used to say that."

"He's right."

"You say that, but you don't mean it. You know you had something amazing in New Port, a family, a boyfriend..."

Rachel looked at him.

"Okay, _had_ a boyfriend. You had friends, were getting a good education..."

"It doesn't matter."

"You know what I think?"

"I know you're gonna tell me."

"I think you're just scared because for once in your life everything was going right. Your dreams were _really_ coming true."

Rachel looked at him instantly knowing that what he was saying was right. She _was_ scared. Caleb had _made_ her scared. Because for once she had what she wanted. _Everything._ And he was the one thing, which threatened to take it all away. She couldn't go through that. Couldn't handle having another dream destroyed, so she ran. Ran back to a place where she knew that this would never happen. There were no dreams which could be taken, no wishes ungranted. But at the same time, knowing this, and knowing what she left behind...

"I'm taking you back," Jimmy said. "You don't belong here any more, you belong with people who love you."

"I..."

"Go do what you have to do, I'll be waiting."

Rachel smiled at him taking one last look at Jimmy before running out of the door to finish one last thing before she returned home.

* * *

Rachel walked straight into the house, not caring if she was un-invited. She saw him and instantly froze, watching as he sat on the couch, polishing his silver gun. The same one, which had fired that one, shot... 

"Come back for more Babe?" Kurt asked not looking up at her.

Rachel felt sick in her stomach. She couldn't believe that she had once actually thought that this was the only man she would ever need, would ever be with.

"Your bro was 'round earlier, talking about staying away from you or some shit."

"I don't need anyone to fight my battles," Rachel stated coldly staying in her spot, standing strong. "I used to rely on my brothers – on you..." she let out a small laugh. "God I was such a dumb ass."

"_Really_?" Kurt asked intrigued.

He turned to her from his spot, eyes trailing to the injury, which he had previously caused her. Rachel saw no regret in his face and it chilled her to the bone.

"You're not what I want. You're not what I _ever_ wanted," she said calmly as he stood from the couch and began to stalk toward her.

"Don't you dare talk to me like that you bitch!" Kurt screamed, reaching out and pushing her hard against a nearby wall.

The wind was knocked out of Rachel and she momentarily regretted going after him at all. What was she thinking? But then at the same time, she knew she had to end this. To tie up loose ends...

"I can talk to you however the hell I want ass hole," she hissed.

Kurt pressed his face close to hers and placed a single hand on the wall next to her face in a fashion, which let her know not to move or else.

"You forget what I gave you," he said.

"What, protection from things that I didn't need protecting from?" Rachel replied sarcastically.

"And your first ride Babe," he smirked letting his eyes trail down her figure and slowly, bringing them back to her face he moved a little closer. "You forget that."

Rachel pressed herself deeper into the wall trying to get as far away from him as possible.

"I haven't forgotten, I just _don't_ _care_. I know that I can have _so_ much more."

She pushed off the wall and moved away from him but Kurt wasn't ready to let her go. Taking a tight hold on her arm he tore her back toward him, using her momentum to pull her body against his. He looked deeply in her eyes and Rachel could see the slyness in his own.

She knew that she had to get out of there or things were going to get ugly.

"You aren't going back there," Kurt whispered tightening his hold on her.

He brought his lips down to hers and let them graze the softness of her neck. Rachel tried to fight against him, but her strength couldn't match his and she knew it.

Taking in a deep breath she brought up both of her hands and pushed with a strength she didn't know she had. Kurt flew backward and away from her.

Rachel spun and went to run from the house when he was on her again, this time placing his hand on the back of her neck he threw her into the bookshelf by the door.

Rachel's head struck the corner of the wood and her vision went black momentarily before she regained knowledge of her surroundings. Blood flowed strong and fast from the deep gash which had been created.

Spinning around she came face to face with Kurt and only realised what was happening once it was too late. He brought up a fist and connected it with her cheek with a powerful force.

Rachel stumbled slightly but regained her composure quickly.

"Normally Ry' would have killed you by now," she stated spitting blood.

"Really?" Kurt asked sarcastically.

"But he's not here. I sent him back."

"All by yourself then." Kurt stated moving closer to her.

Rachel stood a little straighter and looked Kurt directly in the eyes, he was only inches from her now. "It's just me."

"Alone. Powerless."

Rachel only smiled. "That's where you're wrong."

"How do you figure?" Kurt asked tilting his head interested.

Rachel held his gaze for a short moment. "All I need is me..."

She threw a punch at him, lightening fast and powerful knocking him clear off his feet and sending Kurt crashing to the ground.

"...To take you down," she finished before stepping over his squirming body and out the door.

Jimmy was standing there waiting, a look of approval on his face. Rachel knew that he would have been there the entire time, only going to step in if he felt it absolutely necessary. He smiled at her warmly and Rachel nodded.

* * *

The door opened. It seemed to move so slowly, almost too slowly to be real. When it finally revealed the person who stood behind it Rachel's heart did a small jump. 

Ryan stood there, eyes wide in shock, un-focused for a moment.

Rachel raised her eyes to her brothers and he was instantly drawn to the new injuries, which were evident on her face. Her left cheek was developing a light bruise just below her eyes and cuts were seen on various other spots on her face.

They both remained silent for what seemed like an eternity, just staring at each other, not moving, barely breathing. It was then that Rachel saw the small glint in her brother's eyes, one of complete tranquillity.

She threw herself into his welcoming arms, feeling unspeakable happiness in knowing that she was finally back with him, in his protective care. In his warm embrace.

Ryan placed his chin on the top of his sister's head and pulled her close, not knowing what to think, what to say. He was so relieved to have her back, safe. To know that she was with him.

His eyes fell upon Jimmy who was standing beside his car on the opposite side of the street, watching them with the engine still running. Jimmy gave a small smile before climbing back into the car and driving off.

Ryan focused his attention again on the girl in his arms, the one he loved the most. A weight was now lifted from his shoulders. There would be no more sleepless nights of not knowing if she was safe, sheltered. No more secrets, no more questions. He didn't care about any of it, just that she was back home.

He closed his eyes and hugged her tighter.

They heard footsteps coming toward the door and both looked up when Sandy appeared, an annoyed look on his face.

"Ryan can you please shut the door, it's letting in a dra..."

Sandy couldn't finish his sentence, because it was then that his eyes fell on Rachel, standing behind Ryan. Her eyes were downcast, and Sandy knew that she was unable to look at him out of pure regret and sorrow for what she had caused to happen to his son.

"Rachel..." Sandy whispered only then seeing the injuries, which were evident on her face. Cuts, bruises.

The young girl raised her gaze slightly and he saw the pain in her eyes, the complete hatred toward herself. And also the fear.

Rachel didn't know how Sandy was going to react. She had even been scared as to how Ryan would take her sudden return. She had put them through so much, it was impossible to tell if they would forgive her. Part of her almost didn't want them too, she didn't deserve that.

Sandy stared at her for another moment his heart sinking at the sight of what had been done to her before a small smile cracked along his lips.

"You must be hungry after the trip. Lunch?" He asked.

Rachel stood in shock for a second, not expecting the question. She blinked a couple of times before seeing the mischievous look in Sandy's eyes.

It was then that he started laughing, making her jump in shock. What was happening? How could he be laughing? She had almost had his son killed and he wasn't telling her to get out of his house?

Sandy moved a step closer and looked into Rachel's eyes seeing the sheer apology in them.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

Sandy shook his head slowly before pulling her into a tight embrace. "All that matters is that you're safe."

Ryan stood by and watched as the two shared a forgiving hug. He couldn't wipe the feeling of relief away from his face. He moved his hand and placed it gently on his sister's shoulder causing her to turn back to him.

"We'll get you cleaned up," he said and Rachel nodded hesitantly as he lead her into the house and toward the bathroom.

"What happened?" He asked whilst rummaging through the various first-aid items as Rachel watched from her sitting position atop the bench.

She didn't say anything, she didn't know what to say. All of this had happened because she was selfish enough to leave the protective family, which she had behind for her own personal gain. This wouldn't have happened if she stayed in New Port.

Ryan looked at her when she didn't answer his eyes searching hers for a moment. "Rach, you can tell me anything."

Rachel looked back at him seeing the pure love in her brother's eyes. "It..." she began shakily. "Kurt did it...when I...I went back to see him."

Ryan smiled calmly at her and nodded his head. He had known what her answer was going to be, he just needed her to be able to tell him, so that he knew that she was truly ready to open up. That she hadn't lost her trust in him.

Rachel flinched as Ryan lightly pressed a damp cloth to the cut above her brow and he pulled away slightly, now being gentler than he was before.

"Why'd you come back?" Ryan asked after a moment.

Rachel didn't need to answer him, part of Ryan didn't even want her too. All that mattered was that she was back, safe.

"I can't believe Sandy wasn't mad," Rachel whispered.

Ryan frowned at the comment and stopped his movement for a second. "Why would he be mad?" He asked.

Rachel looked at him with a steady gaze. "Because...of what I did."

Ryan only smiled and moved a piece of Rachel's now short hair away from the area he was cleaning. "Sandy loves you Rach, he could never be mad at you."

Once Ryan had nursed all of Rachel's wounds he placed the cloth down on the bench beside her and looked at his sister strongly.

"It's good to have you home," he said giving her a light kiss on the forehead before moving away and out of the door.

Rachel stayed where she was watching the spot where Ryan had just been and not believing what she had just heard. He was happy to have her back. Sandy wasn't upset because of what she'd put his family through. This couldn't be real. Why was everything suddenly fine?

Footsteps sounded from outside the bathroom door and Rachel looked up to see the last person she expected to be standing there staring at her with hurt eyes.

Seth.

Everything wasn't fine...

**_TO BE CONTINUED........._**

(Mwahaha. Well Rachel's back, so you don't have to keep begging me to get her out of Chino any more. Sorry this chapter took a little longer to post, I've bee hugely busy lately and haven't really had much time for writing. In the next chapter issues with the Cohen's and Rachel are raised, and finally things are addressed between Rachel, Luke and Anna. Will post ASAP. PLEASE DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW!!!)


	15. The Forgiving

_**THE FORGIVING**_

_Leave it all behind,  
__Cross the borderline  
__Face the truth,  
__Don't have any time to burn_

_Time To Burn_  
_The Rasmus_

"_I need you... I need you… I need you."_

The words kept repeating over and over in Seth's minds, even now when he stood only meters away from the very person who had spoken them. She sat there atop the bathroom counter staring at him with pure shock in her eyes. Seth had been the last person that Rachel had expected to see standing there, the last one she thought would want to see her again.

The two of them stared silently at each other not knowing what to say, how to act. Everything was different between them now, it had been for so long, and there was never a time when they had truly acknowledged that fact.

"You're okay…" Rachel whispered, her voice so quiet that the words were barely audible.

She could see the hurt in Seth's eyes, see the confusion. He didn't understand why she had run. Again. She hadn't gone to him, she had lost faith in their relationship and she had run. Part of Seth knew that what Rachel had gone through was something that he would never understand, no matter how much he tried, but that didn't matter.

Seth took a step further into the room and Rachel visibly stiffened, waiting for the onslaught that he would bring. She closed her eyes against the curses, the fury, the sheer hatred that she knew he felt toward her. But what she didn't expect was what actually happened.

Rachel felt a warm, comforting hand against her cheek and her eyes widened in shock as a soft thumb brushed lightly against the bruise under her eye. Seth only smiled wirily and pulled away.

"I'm fine," he answered before taking the pain-killers which he had originally been looking for and leaving the room and a dumbfounded Rachel in his wake.

* * *

Things were slowly going back to normal, even though Rachel could barely remember what that actually was. Life at the Cohen's house was still hard. She felt as though she no longer belonged with the family that she had betrayed, but that was not how they saw it.

Sandy was clearly the happiest to see her return, next to Ryan who was now taking it upon himself to make sure that her life was as simple as possible.

Rachel went through the days with a fake smile plastered on her face, one of thankfulness and calm, but it masked the true feelings which still plagued her heart.

Going back to Chino had made her see that things would never be right in her life, no matter how much she believed that they would be. Running from the problem on caused her to have to face other ones. Past loves turned sour, past families killed before her eyes.

Kurt had been the worst blow to her, proving that no matter how much you loved or trusted someone, you never really knew who they were deep inside…

Accept for Seth. Rachel knew him as though they were one. Every detail had stored away in her mind, from the way his hair curled through the wind, to the touch of his flesh on hers. Memories continued to flood back into her mind of a time when they had been happy, so in love.

Now things were confusing and hard, and she didn't know if they would ever truly go back to the way that they were. Part of Rachel almost didn't want them too. She continued to believe that she didn't deserve what she had been given, a loving family, a safe home, a town on people who cared. Not after everything that she had done.

This was the hardest thing for her to have to deal with, the knowledge that there were honest people in the world who cared about her unconditionally, who would die for her. Something about that pulled Rachel down even further. They were fools to think that what they loved was something real. She didn't feel real at all.

But there was a part of her, buried deep inside which knew that things were okay now. That she didn't have to hide any more.

Rachel was removed from her trail of thought by a loud knock at the door. Her eyes suddenly came back into focus and she remembered that she has sitting in the lounge, staring blankly at the floor.

Climbing off the sofa Rachel made her way to the door hoping that it wasn't for her, that she wouldn't have to stand and talk to someone she barely knew as they gave her their condolences.

Pulling the door back slightly Rachel couldn't help the slight smile which tugged at the sides of her lips when she saw who stood there a wide grin on their face.

"Luke," Rachel said shocked. "Uh…hey."

Luke moved forward and pulled Rachel into a tight hug and she welcomed the gesture knowing that it was one of purity.

"I'm so glad you're okay, I was worried," he explained.

As they parted Rachel answered, "I'm fine," when in reality she was the furthest from it, and she knew that Luke could tell that she was lying, though he didn't press the matter.

"Look," Luke began as Rachel slide the door shut fully stepping outside and leaning against the house. "I'm sorry about what happened at the beach, I shouldn't have forced myself on you like that. It's just that I think you're a great person and…"

"It's okay," Rachel cut in, answering honestly. She understood that what Luke had done was a mistake and that he knew it.

"No it's not," he insisted.

"Luke, listen to me," she continued, this time her voice a little stronger as she tried to get her point across. "I overreacted, I was just so caught up in everything else that was happening…"

There was a short silence where no words needed to be spoken. Rachel felt good knowing that Luke had come to see her, they had developed a close friendship which had been momentarily torn when she left, when she turned her back.

"So, what does this mean?" Luke finally asked.

"I love you," Rachel began, "As a friend and I want it to stay that way." She smiled up at him.

"Me too," Luke replied shifting his weight slightly

He was glad that Rachel had been able to forgive him for what he had done as a spare of the moment thing. Truth be told, Luke was unsure about his feelings toward the young girl standing before him. He knew that he cared about her, loved her…but he was sure that this was simply in a platonic way. He had no intention of trying to push it further.

"It's been quiet at school without you," Luke said trying to change the subject to a lighter one.

Rachel narrowed her eyes playfully. "Should I take that as a compliment?"

It took Luke a minute to think about her question. "I'm not too sure."

Rachel let out a small laugh. "Thanks a lot."

Luke shrugged goofily. "So how are you and Seth?"

Rachel was silent, she didn't know what to say. No one had asked her about her relationship with Seth since she had come back and she knew it was because no one wanted to open any old wounds for her. But Luke was different, he wanted her to be honest, knew that the truth would only do her good in the long run.

"I dunno," she answered letting out a long breath and looking slightly downward.

Luke gave her a comforting hit on the shoulder – or at least that's what Rachel thought it was. "Stick in there, you'll be okay."

"Thanks," Rachel said before pushing off the wall she leaned against. "So, I'm better go."

"Yeah," Luke replied. "Me too."

"It was good talking to you," Rachel stated.

And she was being honest. Something about knowing that she could still open up to people helped her believe that there still was something good out there for her. This conversation had lifted an invisible burden from her shoulders, one, which she had now carried around for the days in which she had been back in New Port.

"You too," Luke said smiling before turning away and walking back down the drive.

Rachel smiled after him, and suddenly felt light and free.

* * *

"This could get interesting," Sandy said amused. 

"It's not that bad," Kirsten replied.

"Yeah it is," Ryan answered.

"I think 'comical' is the word we're all looking for here," Seth stated.

They all stood in the kitchen staring over Kirsten's shoulder at the gold coloured paper, which she held in her hands. Decorated with precious silver flakes and the writing carefully crafted in calligraphy pen, each and every one of them found it in some way odd that they were reading an invite to Caleb and Julie's mid-year social party. An invite which she had completely forgotten they had.

Ryan almost found it insulting that they had dared invite the Cohen family, after everything that they had put its members through in the past few months.

"So, do we make an appearance, or all tragically fall ill with salmonella?" Seth asked.

Kirsten cast a glance her son's way. "You for one aren't going anywhere, you need your rest."

Seth stood stunned for a moment, his eyes wide. Suddenly he shook his head using his hand to clamp his gaping mouth shut. "No complaints here."

"How about you Ryan?" Sandy asked. "And don't feel in any way that you have to go, especially if you want to spend some time with your sister."

Ryan stared back at Sandy unsure of what to say. He knew that Marissa would be attending, needing as much support as possible in seeing her mother and Caleb together.

He was being pulled in both directions, not sure if he wanted to decide which path he should take. Ryan loved Marissa but he also loved his sister, who was in desperate need of caring faces around her.

Ryan cast a glance Seth's way as his mind ticked over slightly.

He smiled as he answered. "I'll go, I think Marissa could do with the support."

Sandy nodded his head understandingly. "Seth, you'll be okay on your own?" He asked.

Seth only shrugged.

"Then it's settled," Sandy finished.

"What's settled?" Came the young girl's voice from the doorway.

All the eyes in the room fell on Rachel who stood leaning against the doorframe her arms crossed, an interested look on her face.

A silence swept over the room. No one knew what to say. How to tell her that they would be attending a party hosted by the very people who had caused her so much pain.

"Jeez, and I thought silence was golden," Rachel whispered suddenly aware that everyone had stopped talking in order for her to not hear the conversation. "I'll just go…"

"No, wait!" Kirsten insisted as Rachel went to leave. "We weren't going to tell you because we thought it might be a bit much for you to handle…especially now."

Rachel frowned slightly. "Especially now…?" She repeated trying to prompt an answer.

Kirsten tried to put the news in the nicest was possible. She stood there for a moment, every so often going to say something but then thinking the better of it.

"Is someone going to tell me what's going on?" Rachel asked looking at the people in front of her.

Her eyes fell on Seth's and they shared a silent moment before Rachel tore her gaze away, not wanting him to see what she was truly feeling.

"Rachel," Sandy began. "It really doesn't concern you."

Rachel looked over at him with a smirk on her face. Sandy knew that he couldn't lie to her.

"I'm thinking it does," she stated.

Again there was silence, lasting only until Ryan spoke up.

"Caleb and Julie are having a party tonight – in an hour," he began catching his sister's attention. "Sandy, Kirsten and I are going."

Rachel stood stunned for a minute before a smile crept along her features and she let out a small laugh. She could always trust Ryan to tell her the truth, even if he feared that it would hurt her. He knew her well enough to know that keeping things a secret did her more harm than good.

"That's okay," Rachel said shrugging. "I don't mind."

Seth could see that she clearly did, and mostly because she knew what Ryan had done. He had agreed to go himself, meaning that she and Seth would be left alone together for the night, giving them the perfect opportunity to do what they had both avoided for too long. Talk.

"We'll be leaving at seven o'clock," Kirsten began. "We probably won't be back until late."

Rachel nodded her head absently looking everywhere but at Seth or Ryan. Part of her wondered if they had set this up together, but then again, Seth wouldn't have done something like this. He would have been straight to the point. Still, knowing this didn't make her feel any more comfortable with having to talk to him. Rachel didn't think that she could face that yet without breaking down completely.

The phone rang breaking the tension, which had suddenly swept over the room. As Sandy went to answer it Ryan caught his sister's gaze and saw the slight panic in her eyes. This almost made him regret what he had set up. _Almost_.

"Seth, it's Anna," Sandy said handing the phone over to his son.

Rachel felt a tight pang in her heart in response to his statement. She knew that Anna was still in Seth's life, that they had never parted the way that he and Rachel did, but part of knowing this also came with the cold, hard truth. She felt that Seth had moved on, had taken her departure as a chance to express his true feelings toward someone else. The very someone whom had been partly the reason for their split in the first place.

Seth laughed loudly into the phone pulling Rachel from her trail of thought and back into reality. She tried to mask the hurt expression, which washed over her face at seeing him so happy with another girl but failed miserably.

Making the most of the new distraction Rachel turned and left, not being able to bear the sight, which had now emerged, in the kitchen. She moved down the hallway and up the stairs, taking them two at a time and falling onto her bed wanting to put as much distance between herself and the people on the lower floor as possible.

This failed, however, when she realised that Ryan had followed her the entire way up.

"Anna asked me to give you this," he said handing her an envelope.

Rachel only stared at him not knowing how to answer. What was she supposed to say? She tensed slightly as Ryan sat down beside her on the bed and took in a deep breath.

"I know that this is hard for you Rach," He began.

_What's he talking about…?_ Rachel thought before it suddenly dawned on her. _It's true. I'm not just paranoid. They're really a couple._

Ryan looked at her strongly. "I'll stay home tonight if you want me too."

Rachel half-smiled at the offer, wanting so much for it to be true. But she knew that Marissa needed Ryan more than she did at the moment, even though she felt as though there was no one else for her to talk to.

Rachel shook her head in reply. "Go," she said. "Have fun."

Ryan raised an eyebrow.

"And I use the word 'fun' in the loosest of senses."

Ryan laughed at that before standing up and turning to face her. "Maybe you should think about coming back to school again, it might do you some good. The School Board lifted your suspension while you were away."

Rachel forced on a smile. School was the least of her problems at the moment.

As Ryan went to walk away and leave her to her thoughts he stopped short and looked at the envelope, which he still held in his hands. Glancing over at his sister he dropped it on the mattress beside her.

"Think about it," he said before walking out of the room to prepare for the night ahead.

Rachel watched his retreating back before looking down at the paper beside her. Part of her wanted to tear it up, to burn the pages and hopefully the person who had wrote them. But another part of her was curious as to what it might contain. What horrible truths would be revealed? What horrible words would be spoken?

This was the first kind of contact that she had made with Anna since her return from Chino.

Not being able to stand it any more Rachel took a hold of the envelope and tore open the seel, ripping the pages from within and flipping them open to reveal the words which were neatly written upon the surface.

_Dear Rachel,_

_This is one of the hardest things I think that I have ever had to write. To ask the girl whom I destroyed the life of for forgiveness. I never meant to hurt you in such a way. To cause you so much pain out of the jealousy, which I felt. I know that the words, which I write now, will never be enough to erase the things that I've done, but I ask that they make a difference to the way, which you see me. It was wrong of me to take the relationship that you and Seth had developed into my own hands. It was wrong of me to try and destroy something that was so beautiful. But what done is done and though I wish I could turn back time and change the past, I can't. All that I want you to know is that I'm sorry for what I've done, and for the way that things only worked out for one of us._

_Anna._

Rachel stared at the words on the page in complete shock. Anna had apologised, had taken the time to think about what she had done and the consequences which she had caused. Rachel almost wanted to find the girl and give her a hug, to tell her that everything was alright between them and that there was nothing to worry about. But then her eyes fell on the one sentence, which made her heart sink.

_For the way that things only worked out for one of us._

This confirmed everything that Rachel had feared. She now believed that Anna and Seth were together, officially. That all the chances which she and him could have had to make things right between them again were gone.

Forever.

* * *

The time for Sandy, Kirsten and Ryan to leave for the party came too quickly for Rachel's liking. It meant that she would be alone once again, left with her thoughts – and therefore the pain, which came with them.

"We'll see you two later on," Sandy said waving Seth and Rachel goodbye as he and Kirsten walked out of the front door.

Ryan turned to his sister. "You need _anything_…" he began.

Rachel only smiled, enough of a reaction to let Ryan know that she would get in contact with him if she felt that she had too.

"She'll be fine with ol' Seth looking out for her," Seth stated but this only caused and awkward silence to slip over the trio.

They all knew that they were thinking the same thing…

This could end in disaster 

Ryan gave Rachel a small wink before turning and following Sandy and Kirsten to the car.

Rachel watched her retreating brother feeling Seth shift slightly beside her. She didn't dare look at him out of fear that he would be looking back at her with those knowing eyes.

She could tell that it was going to be a long night.

* * *

Seth let out a long breath as he dressed after having a shower to clear his mind. He had known that tonight was going to be hard for both him and Rachel, neither had ever thought that they would be forced together like this. Forced to do something, which they should have done long ago.

He sat on his bed silently aware that Rachel was outside laying on one of the poolside chairs thinking the same things that he was.

How were they ever going to work things out if neither of them wanted to take the first step?

Seth knew the answer. It was because neither of them wanted to face the fact that what had happened between them was real. They didn't want to think that people could have torn them apart in such a painful way. That Rachel had been pushed so far over the edge that she had left his side and run to the place where she believed that she was safe.

He didn't want to believe that she had run back into the arms of her former lover, the one that had been there for her through her entire life. The one whom Seth believed knew her so much more than he did.

But despite this, the lingering feeling of something that he could almost describe as relief came over him. Despite feeling sick to the core at the thought that Kurt had hurt Rachel in any way, Seth was happy that she had finally realised that she didn't need Kurt in her life any more. That he didn't deserve her.

Seth stared out of his window into the darkening night sky and thought of the first time that he had layed eyes on Ryan's younger sister's beautiful face. He could remember it as though it only just happened. The way she seemed to light up the room as she stood there smiling kindly at him. The way her eyes carried strength and yet at the same time vulnerability, which would grow to be used against her.

None of them had predicted the changes, which would soon occur within Rachel and the people that surrounded her. Changes that would alter the way in which her life was lived forever.

Seth's gaze stayed fixed on the now dark sky, yet he didn't really see it at all.

* * *

Rachel slowly climbed the stairs to her room after finding that the chilled night air was a little too much to handle. She didn't know how long she had sat outside watching the ocean in the distance and wishing more than ever that the night would end. That the morning would come and that everything would be alright.

As she moved down the hallway she heard Seth's door swing open and looked up to see him standing there, his shirt open revealing the dressed wound which he had received whilst trying to rescue her from Chino.

Rachel's eyes ticked to his for a moment before she diverted them and kept walking.

"Rach," Seth began not knowing where he had pulled the courage to speak up from.

Rachel stopped dead in her tracks when she heard the words that she had been dreading.

"Can we talk?"

**_TO BE CONTINUED………_**

(ARGH!!! Only 1 more chapter to go. Isn't that scary? It feels like only yesterday that I developed the concept behind the first Atwood Sister story.Sorry it took a bit to update, ihave been wanting to for ages but because of the site update i couldn't.I'm not going to give you a preview of what happens in the next chapter because I'm honestly not sure what to say without revealing any of the surprises ahead. PLEASE REVIEW, I really want to know your opinions. I need to know them. Also, SEQUEL???? Will post soon.)


	16. The Bitter Sweet

_**THE BITTER SWEET **_

_What happened to us? We used to be so perfect  
__Now we're lost and lonely  
__What happened to us? Deep inside I wonder  
__Did I lose my only?_

_What Happened To Us?  
__Hoobastank_

"It's all so different now," Marissa said as she and Ryan sat watching the crowd.

"Yeah…" Ryan replied softly.

His mind was not really on the party but rather the possible things that could have been happening back at the Cohen's house between Seth and Rachel. Ryan's heart ached with the thought that the pair would never be able to work out their problems, even becoming friends again if nothing else.

_Wonder if they've spoken yet, _he thought.

Ryan kept having second thoughts, kept thinking that maybe he should jump in the car right now and drive back home, making sure that his sister and best friend didn't have to be put through the pain that they would be. Then the reasoning side of him thought better, knowing that what he was doing was right.

"So how are you holding up?" Ryan asked trying to get his mind off what was happening elsewhere.

Marissa almost laughed at the question, she couldn't help it. Things were beginning to become worse at home for her, and seeing her mum together with Caleb again only made those feelings worse.

"Right now, I'm not too sure," she finally replied.

"Things will get better," Ryan stated.

Marissa only shrugged at the comment. "Maybe. Right now I don't really care."

"Why's that?"

Marissa turned to face Ryan kissing him lightly on the lips as she did. "Because I'm with you."

* * *

Rachel felt her heart begin to beat wildly in her chest as she stood, stone cold in the hallway, her back still facing Seth. She could almost see the look of longing on his face. 

Slowly turning her eyes met his briefly before she looked to the ground. He held the door open as he leaned against the frame staring at her intently.

It took Rachel a moment to realise what she was doing. Moving toward him, despite not wanting too. Stepping into his room she crossed her arms insecurely, her eyes travelling over to the bed, before focusing on the floor.

"Why won't you look at me?" Seth asked as he walked up to her.

"Because I don't want you to see me," Rachel answered.

Seth moved his hand to her chin and lifted her eyes to his. "I _want_ to see you."

Rachel looked at him, into the eyes she used to get lost in and saw into his soul. One of love and forgiveness. It almost killed her inside.

She moved a shaking hand to Seth's exposed chest, moving it to where a white, square bandage covered his wound. Seth stepped closer into the gesture.

"It's all my fault," she whispered trailing a finger over the edge of the material.

"No," Seth insisted shaking his head. "You couldn't have known."

"I never…" Rachel began pulling her hand away. "When I went back to him…I never…I mean, he tried to make me but…"

Seth smiled at her. "It doesn't matter."

Rachel looked away from him. "How are you and Anna doing?" She asked not really wanting to know the answer.

Seth looked at her closely. "Rach, Anna and me aren't together."

Rachel could almost see the look on her face, a completely blank expression. "What?"

"How could I go out with someone else when I'm still in love with you?" Seth answered.

Rachel looked at him in shock, she had not expected the answer she received. Her heart began to hammer in her chest as Seth took another step toward her.

"No…" she whispered backing up a step before moving away from him and out the door.

"Rach…" Seth began going after her. When he placed a hand on her arm Rachel whirled around her eyes wide.

"You…no, you can't," she uttered.

"Why not?" Seth asked placing his hands on her shoulders. "Why can't I?"

"B-because I don't deserve you," Rachel whispered.

Seth stared at her strongly taking her hands in his. Rachel tried to pull away but only succeeded in moving Seth closer, her hands up against her chest, Seth's still entwined in hers. He made sure she was looking into his eyes when he spoke.

"You deserve the world."

"No," Rachel said turning away.

"Yes, Rach," Seth insisted pulling her back to him.

Rachel looked deep into Seth's eyes. "Why are you doing this?" She whispered.

Seth looked down at her believing the words that he spoke more than anything. "Because I love you."

* * *

"Pretty swanky do," Jimmy commented looking about the grand hall in which he stood taking a swig from his bear bottle. "A few too many suits for my liking though." 

Sandy nodded his head seeing all of the businessmen, some of the most powerful in all of New Port as they sipped their wine and exchanged their stories of money making and greed.

"Can't say I haven't seen it before though," Sandy answered.

"What did you two expect, teenagers with surfboards and B average grades?" Kirsten asked realistically.

Jimmy smiled. "It would have been nice."

Sandy let out a sigh causing Kirsten to look his way. "What is it?"

He glanced at her. "I'm just worried about Seth and Rachel, maybe I should call just to make sure they're okay."

"Nice little plan you have going there," Jimmy stated.

"Excuse me?"

Jimmy looked from Sandy to Kirsten and then back again as if they were the slowest people on earth. "Putting them together for the night…_alone._"

When he received blank looks from both of his companions.

"Are you serious? You didn't realise that's what you did?"

Sandy narrowed his eyes slightly. "Ryan," he sighed.

Kirsten looked over at him. "He planned the whole thing. That's why he came tonight, it wasn't because of Marissa. He wanted to get those two alone together so they were forced to talk."

They all fell silent, thinking about what this new revelation could mean. Sandy completely understood why Ryan had done what he had. He wanted his sister and friend to be happy, and he knew as well as anyone that they wouldn't be until they made up for the time lost between them.

"I think it's damn smart of the boy," Jimmy finally spoke.

Kirsten looked up at him before letting out a small laugh. She knew herself that it would probably be the best thing for the pair. Lock them in a house together and let them duke it out. But she was suddenly filled with dread. What happened if this brilliant plan came with a painful flaw?

* * *

Rachel looked up at Seth feeling the sudden need to collapse to the floor away from the world. She didn't understand how he could be forgiving her, how he could be professing his undying love for her. 

Tears welled behind her eyes and rolled fast down her cheeks as she realised that this was someone who would do anything for her. Would die for her and yet still love her like there was no tomorrow.

Seth saw the tears running fast down her face as she stood and faced him. He knew that though they were in sorrow, part of them were in relief that he would not leave her.

He moved closer to Rachel guiding her into his room and closing the door. He moved his hands to the side of her face and brushed her hair away.

"Seth…" Rachel began.

Seth could see the deep pain in her eyes, the same pain which had been there when she had been there beside him as he lay helpless on the cold gravel, bullet wound in his shoulder.

He could feel his own tears forming behind his eyes.

"…I'm so sorry," she ended.

Seth was shaking his head at Rachel comment. "No, don't be sorry. Never be sorry."

Tears were beginning to slide down his own cheeks now as he placed his forehead on Rachel's, feeling her shaking against him.

"Never be sorry."

Rachel was suddenly in his arms, the two so close for the first time in so long. Seth pulled her body close to his feeling his shirt growing damp with her tears.

"Don't cry, Rach, please don't cry," he whispered as she continued to let out her emotions.

Rachel pulled her head back hesitantly and looked into his eyes, their faces so close that Seth could feel her warm breath. His lips brushed lightly against hers not knowing how she would react when he did something he had wanted to for so long. He kissed her, instantly feeling her return the gesture, which made a relief flow through his body. As she moved closer Seth deepened the symbol of his love to her. The feeling was on of desperate passion fuelled by the need for each other.

He felt Rachel take a tight hold on his shirt, her tears still falling even as their lips met.

Seth kissed her again, this time not being able to express enough how he just wanted her to be happy. How he wanted to _make_ her happy.

"Rach…" Seth whispered as he pulled away only enough to speak.

Rachel sniffed slightly trying to control the tears, which continued to fall from her eyes. "Yeah."

"I love you."

Rachel looked deep into Seth's eyes for a moment, searching them as though they would unlock all of the mysteries that came with them. She didn't need to answer him with words, Seth knew what her response was when she pulled him back down toward her and kissed him passionately.

* * *

_Marsal had pinned her between himself and the cold wall of the bathroom; his dark eyes searching hers with no concern whatsoever. _

_Rachel could feel herself shaking, knowing that even if she struggled it would be a losing battle. There was nothing that she could do. If she screamed he would kill her, but if she didn't…_

_She could feel the knife that he held pressed deeply against her throat, cutting into her flesh and drawing blood._

_Her entire body felt cold._

"_Trust me Babe," Kurt whispered causing Rachel's eyes to fly open as she realised that she was no longer with Marsal._

_She stood with her past love looking out over the side of a cliff where she stood, her feet teetering on the edge. She could feel the sharp rocks beneath her as they pierced the flesh of her skin. _

"_Choose," he began. "You or him."_

_Rachel's eyes whirled and she saw Seth standing only meters away from them his face downcast, hair sprawled around his head._

"_Seth," she murmured, terrified about what was to come._

"_Sorry Babe, wrong answer."_

_A gunshot rang out and Seth's body slumped to the ground._

* * *

"No!" Rachel screamed as she shot bolt upright, clutching the blanket over her bare chest as her eyes flew open. 

Seth was quick to awaken too, sitting up from his position beside her on the bed and placing a hand on her shoulder. "Rach, what is it?"

Rachel's body trembled violently as the aftershock of what she had seen fell upon her. There was nothing that she could have done as she was faced with the two men who had left a stain in her mind.

"God, you're shaking," Seth said pulling the blanket from himself and rapping it tightly around her body.

He took her into his arms feeling her shaking lightly against him as he did and wanting more than ever to comfort her.

"Shh," Seth whispered. "It's okay, it was just a dream."

"No, it wasn't," Rachel said pulling away only slightly to look into his eyes. "It really…and you were…"

Seth smiled down at her kissing her gently on the forehead as he did. "Rach, I'm right here."

He stared at her in the dark for a moment thinking about what a beauty she was sitting there beside him with only a blanket to cover her, he, himself in the same position. Bringing a hand up to her face, Seth gently tucked a piece of fallen hair behind her ear and brought his lips to hers. Rachel melted into the gesture feeling completely safe in his arms.

"It's okay," Seth murmured resting her head against his chest.

Rachel shook her head slightly. "No it's not."

Seth pulled away from her and looked strongly into her eyes. "What are you talking about."

Rachel tried to find the words, tried to explain to him that she felt so horrible for what she had put his family through. Even looking at Seth now, seeing him sitting there beside her in his bed, wanting her more than ever, Rachel still felt the pain of knowing what she had done.

"I hurt you," she managed.

Seth frowned at the comment. "No…"

"_Yes"_ she insisted. "I hurt you and Kirsten and Sandy and…" the words caught in her throat slightly. "And Ry'."

Seth sighed. "Don't think that way."

"How else am I supposed to think? I can't even believe you're here now."

Seth smiled down at her, seeing the pure honesty in her eyes. "You know you'll always have me."

"I don't want to lose you again," Rachel whispered, her voice party muffled by Seth's chest as she buried her face against him.

"I'm not going _anywhere_," he insisted.

Rachel let out a long breath as she felt her heart finally start to beat at its normal rate again. The impact of what she had seen weighed heavily upon her even as Seth began to speak.

"I want to give you something," Seth said sliding out from under the covers and moving to the opposite side of the room.

Rachel propped herself up on her elbow and watched him with a hint of interest as he moved about the room, sheet clutched around his waist.

Finally finding what he wanted Seth moved back to the bed and lay beside her switching on the bedside lamp as he did.

"Here," he said handing over the golden square box he held. "I was waiting to give you this. Happy birthday."

Rachel looked at it with narrowed eyes. "Does it have a receipt?" She asked not wanting Seth to have spent any money on her.

Seth only smiled at the comment.

Rachel looked down at him sitting up and re-positioning the blanket around her. Slowly she opened the box to reveal the sparkling necklace within. Her eyes went wide at the sight. From a thin, silver chain hung five pointed crystals, each as flawless as the one it proceeded.

"Oh my God," Rachel gasped the light dancing along her features. "Seth, I can't take this, it's too much."

"The woman made it very clear that there are no refunds and I can already tell you now don't even think of giving it to me because I checked and I have _nothing_ that goes with it." Seth smiled at her after finishing.

Rachel couldn't speak, she was in complete shock, it was only when she felt Seth shift beside her and his hands come up to take the box that her eyes snapped back into focus. He unfastened the clip on the chain and moving with care, Seth rapped the chain around her neck and closed it securely at the back, letting his hand linger at the front for a moment before falling back to his side.

"It's beautiful," Rachel said touching the crystals, which lay, against her neck.

"Something beautiful for _someone_ beautiful," Seth answered.

Rachel raised an eyebrow. "You're so korny sometimes."

Seth grinned wider. "It works, doesn't it."

Rachel looked down at him before moving closer. "Guess tonight's your lucky night," she whispered before kissing Seth deeply.

* * *

Caleb stood before the crowd and an instant need to punch the man washed over Ryan. He despised him, not just because he had hurt his sister, but because he didn't show any remorse. Even now as he stood proudly before thousands, gloating about his business. Even as his eyes locked with Ryan's for an instant, there was nothing. No sorry, no feelings of making a mistake. 

"I would like to say a final word before officially commencing the party," Caleb spoke into the microphone. "First, where is my darling Ju-Ju?"

Ryan felt Marissa noticeably stiffen beside him as her mother took to the stage with Caleb smiling widely and waving at the people before her.

"I have to say that I couldn't have done any of this without my beautiful companion. Thank you," Caleb ended kissing Julie lightly as she blushed a crimson red.

"Oh Cal, you could do anything," Julie commented.

Ryan almost laughed, he had to force himself not too. Caleb Nickel _could_ do anything, but in the process he would hurt anyone and everything in his way, no matter who they were.

Caleb stood silently for a moment simply looking at the people who had gathered before the small stage that he stood on.

"There are some people here tonight who are not my biggest fans," he began. His eyes trailed through the people and rested on Ryan's. "But I'm here to tell them that I don't care about what they think of me because they are not the ones with everything that I have."

The crowd was now eerily silent, some people even turning to Ryan, curious as to whom Caleb was talking directly to. But he had now taken his gaze over to where Kirsten, Sandy and Jimmy sat.

"I am not sorry for the things that I have done, because they have all led me to be where I am today. To be able to stand in front of you fine people and speak as the richest man in New Port."

Ryan could feel the blood within him begin to boil at the words which were spilling from Caleb's mouth. How dare he talk as though nothing had happened. He had ruined Rachel's life, had put the Cohen's through complete hell and still he didn't feel anything.

"These things happen," Caleb went on. "People go up against each other."

He looked hard at Ryan and smiled wickedly.

"And only one can come out on top."

Ryan's mind instantly ticked to his sister and Seth back at the Cohen's house. He prayed that they were okay.

* * *

Rachel lay cuddled against Seth's body, her every inch exhausted. She rested her head against his bare chest, running lazy fingers along his exposed flesh. 

Seth smiled down at her, kissing the top of her head gently and savouring the feeling of her unclothed body pressed against his, a blanket the only thing covering them. He suddenly knew what true happiness was, to have the love of his life lying in his arms.

Rachel let out a small tired sigh before shifting against Seth's body.

"Are you okay?" He asked looking down at her.

Rachel thought about the question for a moment before answering.

"I'm fine."

And for the first time in too long she actually meant it. She was no longer afraid. Not worried of what might become of her. For at that moment the only thing that she could think of the was young man lying beside her, loving her with his all.

Rachel moved her head up and kissed Seth lightly before lying back down against him and falling asleep in her lover's arms.

**_THE END………for now_**

(Wow, its over. Thanks so much for you support of this story. You guys rock. Yes there will be a sequel and I would love any of your suggestions as to what should happen in it. You know I only realised in finishing this chapter that I've been starting and ending these stories in the same way. The first one started with Rachel and Ryan and him thinking about how he could save her. It ended with both of them and her talking about how he had saved her. This story started with Rachel and Seth and Seth being there for her, and it ended with both of them and on the same topic. Kinda scary. I didn't even know I was doing it. LOL. Anyways, can't wait to start the next story. Please review and give lots of suggestions. Peace out)


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